IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The maintenance of public libraries is a waste of money because of computer technologies that have the same function. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#maintenance #libraries #waste #money #computer #technologies #function
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The upkeep of common information
centers
Change the spelling
centres
show examples
 is viewed as uneconomical due to computer technologies that play a similar role. I strongly disagree with the statement because communal reference spaces are home
of
Change preposition
to
show examples
 knowledge and
accessible
Replace the word
access
show examples
 to all and sundry, at a minimal cost. To start with, book collection
centers
Change the spelling
centres
show examples
 benefit netizens from all walks of life regardless of their social class, so whether rich,marginalized or poor, the accessibility to these facilities is pocket friendly in terms of cost.
Further
Linking Words
, most of these study spaces belong and are funded by the Government through taxation by the common man
this
Linking Words
 helps in
reduction
Correct article usage
the reduction
show examples
 of the monthly subscriptions
thus
Linking Words
 making it affordable.
For example
Linking Words
, a study done in the University of Nairobi Sociology Department in the year 2015 revealed that membership by subscription for both new and old clients had shown an upward trend and was at 80% due to easy accessibility.
Secondly
Linking Words
, in the media
Change the spelling
centres
show examples
centers
Add a comma
,centers
show examples
 one can come across several books without cost and
this
Linking Words
 can help in sharpening one's knowledge and skills. To add to that , the librarians are at the
members
Change to a genitive case
member's
members'
show examples
 disposal and usually help and guide in finding useful and accurate content as opposed to digital technology which is filled with misinformation. To add to that, the bookstore
also
Linking Words
 provides the
end user
Add a hyphen
end-user
show examples
 with a quiet environment devoid of
destructions
Fix the agreement mistake
destruction
show examples
. In conclusion, while it argued that suspension of shared reference areas is a waste of financial resources, I strongly disagree with the notion since it is not only easy to access but
also
Linking Words
 affordable.
Submitted by maryoduor5030 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: