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Band 7

Some people think that having a set retirement age (e.g. 65 years) for everybody, regardless of occupation, is unfair. They believe that certain workers deserve to retire and receive a pension at an earlier age. Do you agree or disagree? Which types of workers do you think should benefit from early retirement?

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It is often argued whether a retirement
age
 of around 60-65 years for everybody is needed or not.
This
 essay disagrees that the retirement
age
 must be set irrespective of occupation.
This
 essay
first
 discusses how different type of work takes a varied amount of toll of the body and
then
 explains how each individual achieves a prime at different ages in their life.
Firstly
, the amount of physical work involved in the selected occupation should be the prime reason before
age
 to start earning a pension is chosen. The more physical stress a job has, the lesser the retirement
age
 it should have.
This
 is because there are more chances of someone injuring themselves when they are old as compared to when they were young.
For example
, a scientific study by a popular college in India states that people working in the mechanical industry tend to be more vulnerable to injuries at an early
age
 rather than those working in the IT industry.
As a result
, it becomes unfair to set the same
age
 to stop working for both these fields.
Secondly
, there cannot be a specific
age
 where a person is at their best. The best can arrive at any
age
. We know the world's famous food chain KFC was started by its owner when he was way above 60 years. There indeed cannot be any
age
 restrictions imposed on when one can achieve success in their life. In conclusion, a fixed
age
 cannot be decided for a person to retire as it varies depending upon their line of work or in which year they achieve their prime.
Submitted by vaibhav.bhat2097 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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