Sending criminals to prison is not the best method of dealing with them. Education and job training are better ways to help them. Do you agree or disagree?

In these
Change preposition
These
show examples
days, the most effective ways of punishing
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
wrongdoers are
debateable
Correct your spelling
debatable
among individuals. Even though many people support the existing prison system, the consideration of the rest is providing education and
skills
training
programs
. I totally embrace
latter
Add an article
the latter
show examples
concept because these methods are the stimulator factors for reforming their attitudes and earning some subsidies.
To begin
with, nobody can deny that
educational
Replace the word
education
show examples
and job training
programs
can direct criminals to the right path as they teach
to
Correct pronoun usage
them to
show examples
distinguish between the right and wrong things.
Furthermore
, the involvement in
such
programs
averts them to make
further
the
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apply
show examples
prison-related offences
such
as murder,
bulling
Correct your spelling
bullying
show examples
or others. According to statistics, the figure for crime rate is proved to be declined in countries where aforementioned reforms are put into practice.
Thus
, for redesigning positively offenders'
personality
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personalities
show examples
, teaching and training
them
Change the pronoun
their
show examples
job
skills
are
best
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the best
show examples
solution.
Secondly
, it is generally believed that
programs
such
as providing education and skill training have a great many contributions not only for the government but
also
for their own family. Because many law-breakers are the main bread-earners, they can make money even in jail and support financially their family.
Besides
, after obtaining
qualification
Fix the agreement mistake
qualifications
show examples
or job
skills
, prisoners could be assets for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society when they are released from
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
prison. A good example of
this
is
brother
Add an article
the brother
a brother
show examples
of my friend who gained handicap
skills
during
imprisonment
Correct pronoun usage
his imprisonment
show examples
period and continued
further
to serve
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society.
Therefore
, educating and training criminals are beneficial for both the government and their family members. In conclusion, I strongly believe that
educational
Replace the word
education
show examples
and skill training reforms
brings
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bring
show examples
only benefits to prisoners in terms of reforming their
personaly
Correct your spelling
personally
personal
and contributing financially to their families and the government.
Submitted by nodirbekmsh on

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Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Rehabilitation
  • Recidivism
  • Reintegration
  • Vocational training
  • Incarceration
  • Deterrent
  • Correctional facilities
  • Reformative justice
  • Social reentry
  • Ex-offender
  • Criminal justice system
  • Restorative practices
  • Penal system
  • Social marginalization
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