IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Some people encourage a students to comment their teachers to improve the education quality but some of them think it led a students less respect and discipline in the classroom. Discuss both of views

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The education quality should maintain the standard and
also
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 improve in a better way. Some
the
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that article use may be incorrect here.

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people believe that students need comments or criticism from their teachers to improve their educational quality.
Although
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 someone thought it will makes students not respect and discipline in the classroom.
This
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 essay will discuss a reason from both views. While you learn some things or even having an exam you still need to know the feedback or even your scores to improve your skill. In the other words, you can't develop your skill by not take advice or the correct answer for your exam as well as how can a teacher evaluate themself by not listening to the students who are a person that can tell how good their teaching are. The behaviour of people can changes after they keep doing
in
Change preposition
apply

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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the same process for a long time
such
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 as when you woke up in the morning at 9am. for 2 months and you can't wake up at 11am. in the
next
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 day. The reason why I mentioned
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 behaviour is
because
Replace the word
that

It appears that the conjunction because is the wrong word choice after reason is. Consider changing it to that or rewriting the sentence.

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 if
you
Add a verb
areyou
wereyou

Your sentence appears to be missing a verb.

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 once courageous to comments or criticism your teachers ,you will do it again and
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 is rude and not show some respect especially in Asian countries
where
Replace the word
were

It appears that where is not correct in this context. Consider changing it.

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 to have a strong conservative culture. To sum up, In both ways have their good reason but to develop something in a better way sometimes you should leave something behind
such
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 as a cultural
things
Correct the article-noun agreement
thing

The indefinite article a may not be required with the plural noun things in this sentence. Consider removing the article, or changing the noun to singular.

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 but we can
also
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 keep it together , we can decrease some old traditions to take a good benefit of new things. The world should have a balance and still need to process.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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