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Band 4.5

Social media is becoming increasingly popular amongst all age groups. However, sharing personal information on social media websites does have risks. Do you think that the advantages of social media outweigh the disadvantages?

#media #age #groups #information #websites #risks
Today with
an
Correct article usage
the
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 advent
many
Change preposition
of many
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 social
media
network
Fix the agreement mistake
networks
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 and most
people
 using in all ages, and it
is become
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becomes
became
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 an integral part
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
 most
life
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lives
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 of
people
. With these developments in social communication, some issues and problems have emerged.
although
 the negatives
associated
Add a missing verb
are associated
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 with social
media
, I think that
advantages
Correct article usage
the advantages
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 outweigh the disadvantages. In
this
 essay, I will discuss
advantages
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the advantages
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 and
disadvantage
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disadvantages
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 of
exist
Change the form of the verb
existing
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 social
media
 in
this
 era and put forth my opinion.
To begin
 with, there are many negative influences from social
media
 networks, one of the main problems is
Correct article usage
the spreads
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spreads
Fix the agreement mistake
spread
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 of disinformation that will
causes
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cause
show examples
 numerous wrong decisions and do bad
action
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actions
show examples
.
In addition
, social
media
 is proper of
rumors
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rumours
show examples
 spread,
this
 is due to the lack of censorship of content since
who
Correct pronoun usage
those who
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 publish are just normal
people
 without any official entity.
On the other hand
, it is hard to ignore
advantages
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the advantages
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 that comes with social
media
,
firstly
, by
follow
Change the verb form
following
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
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well-known
people
 like doctors or researchers they can notify us with new information as well as it enables us to be asked them about anything related to their work even personal advice for free in a few minutes and the take
advantages
 from their responds them on other questions. In conclusion, my point of view,
although
 the negatives associated with social
media
 and the numerous of
people
 use it day after day will shape our future and our
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
way of communicating and learning because social
media
 offers to us a
Correct your spelling
wide range
show examples
wide-range
Correct your spelling
wide range
show examples
 of ways to learn from experts which contributes that to share the knowledge over the world.
Submitted by yahyagamal2010 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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