IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

Some children find some school subjects difficult(for example maths or philosophy), so these subjects should be optional rather than compulsory. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#children #school #subjects #maths #philosophy
Curriculum for schools
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
 evolved to a certain extent that some
students
 find it difficult to understand(
for example
 maths or philosophy). Some people believe that it will be better if these
subjects
 were made optional rather than
compulsary
Correct your spelling
compulsory
.
This
 essay will address both these statements and my opinion on the same. To start with, It is important for all
students
 to get
atleast
Correct your spelling
at least
 a chance to get
the
Correct article usage
an
show examples
 understanding of what a particular
subject
 is about.One advantage of having the
subjects
 optional is that the children will not feel
burden
Add an article
the burden
show examples
 of that
subject
 and
hence
 can focus on the
subjects
 that he enjoys learning.
For
example
Add a comma
,example
show examples
 a student that
dosent
Correct your spelling
doesn't
 likes to do
math
Add an article
the math
show examples
.
However
Add a comma
,However
show examples
 due to no flexibility provided in
Add an article
the curriculum
show examples
curriculum
Add a comma
,curriculum
show examples
 he still has to do
math
Add an article
the math
show examples
.
This
 might affect grades for other
subject
Fix the agreement mistake
subjects
show examples
 or
student
Fix the agreement mistake
students
show examples
 might not be able to focus well on other
subjects
. On the other side, One of the major
disadvantage
Change to a plural noun
disadvantages
show examples
for
Change preposition
of
show examples
 not making
Correct article usage
the subject
show examples
subject
Fix the agreement mistake
subjects
show examples
 optional is that it might cause unnecessary stress to some of the children.As all children cannot handle the pressure
that is
 caused by the
subject
 that he/she
dosen't
Correct your spelling
doesn't
don't
 want to learn.
For
example
Add a comma
,example
show examples
 consider a child that likes art but
instead
 of
art
Add a comma
,art
show examples
 he is forced to attend philosophy class. So in
this
 case it may happen that he/she may start bunking other classes and roam outside of school.
This
 will lead to some other scenario
alltogether
Correct your spelling
altogether
all together
. So in a nutshell, In my opinion, it is necessary for
Add an article
the school
a school
show examples
school
Fix the agreement mistake
schools
show examples
 to include a hybrid model
where
Correct your spelling
wherein
show examples
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
students
 can get to decide their curriculum.
This
 will not only escalate
interest
Correct article usage
the interest
show examples
 of
students
 more towards their
subject
 but
also
 it will be beneficial for
school
Fix the agreement mistake
schools
show examples
 to get their global rankings high.
Submitted by ahuja1221 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: