IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

In future all cars, buses and trucks will be driverless. The only people travelling inside these vehicles will be passengers. Do you think the advantages of driverless vehicles outweigh the disadvantages?

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It is true that turning vehicles into autonomous systems is inevitable in the following decades.
Although
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 there are some demerits associated with
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 truth, I reckon that the merits by far outweigh them. On the one hand,
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 could bring about some problems.
Firstly
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, most critics blame automatic cars and
other automobile
Change the wording
another automobile
other automobiles

The adjective other appears to be modifying the singular noun automobile. Consider making a change.

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 for some disadvantages, one of which is their security. They believe that despite high-end sophisticated security
structure
Fix the agreement mistake
structures

It seems that structure may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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 installed on these cars, penetrating their structure by criminal hackers could result in a catastrophe, meaning that they can take control of them as they want and that even make them crash.
Secondly
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, due to the fact that driving is a sensitive action, it is not acceptable even if there is a little bug in the automatic driving system; while every computer software and hardware has some defects.
Thirdly
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, maps and roads are changing every day resulting in complications for the navigation arrangement of
these wagon
Change the determiner
this wagon
these wagons

It appears that the plural demonstrative these is modifying the singular noun wagon. Consider using a singular demonstrative or a plural noun instead.

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. Above all, driving is not only a hobby for some people but
also
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 a sport in which many champions create honours for their teams and countries yearly.
However
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, I believe that its positives cannot be rivalled. Despite some downsides for every newly-emerged state-of-the-art technology, they should be taken into practice to become stable and reliable. Take GPS as an example, it had noticeable errors when
first
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 implemented, but after a few years the bugs were fixed and it became mature enough to play a huge role in our lives.
Moreover
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, it is obvious that computer
scheme
Fix the agreement mistake
schemes

It seems that scheme may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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 have the power of calculating and decision-making several times faster than a human's brain, which would considerably decrease the number of driving faults made by humans, and in turn, cut down the car accident rate. In a nutshell,
although
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.
driverless
Add an article
the driverless

The noun phrase driverless car seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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car
Fix the agreement mistake
cars

It seems that car may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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 may come up with some downsides, their advantages outweigh them undoubtedly.

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • driverless vehicles
  • advantages
  • disadvantages
  • increased safety
  • reduced traffic congestion
  • improved efficiency
  • accessibility
  • disabled
  • elderly
  • job displacement
  • privacy concerns
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