Some people think that it is better to build more public parks and sports facilities in new towns rather than shopping malls. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

The enthusiastic life simulates the urban developments in building more public
parks
than shopping
malls
. I partly agree with
this
viewpoint for its benefit to citizen’s health, but it cannot be denied the revenues of shopping
malls
. It is obvious that developing more public
parks
creates a healthy community. More public
parks
encourage people to do
exercises
Fix the agreement mistake
exercise

It seems that exercises may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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. Many research showed that work-out prevents the possibility of many diseases
such
as obesity, diabetes, and cardiovascular diseases.
This
,
therefore
, promotes both physical and mental health.
However
, building shopping
malls
increases the growth of economics. It will provide essential needs for customers. The increase of population requires more shops to reach the population demands.
This
provides the benefits to the revenue of the economics In conclusion, building public
parks
enhances community health, while expanding shopping
malls
contributes to the development of the economy. I believed that it could be better if government build the park or shopping mall for appropriate purposes
to
Change preposition
for

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
the country.
Submitted by khanh532000cm on

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