Some people think that people should choose their job based on income in order to provide security for their family . Do you think money is an important factor when choosing a job?What other factors should be considered?

#people #job #income #security #money #factor #factors

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is opine

Change the verb form

is opined

show examples

by some

people

Use synonyms

that

their

Replace the word

there

show examples

should be based on wages, in order to give security for their family.

Although

Linking Words

, wealth is necessary to complete basic needs, yet comfortable

environment

Use synonyms

and job satisfaction

are

Change the verb form

are also mattered

show examples

also

Linking Words

matter of concern while they are choosing

job

Add an article

a job

show examples

To begin

Linking Words

with, adequate remuneration is necessary for survival.

Firstly

Linking Words

, if employees have

good

Correct article usage

a good

show examples

pay scale

then

Linking Words

they can provide

luxurious

Add an article

a luxurious

show examples

lifestyle to family members, so many

people

Use synonyms

look for pay while searching

work

Change preposition

for work

show examples

Secondly

Linking Words

, in order to give proper education to children so that they can have

secure

Correct article usage

a secure

show examples

future,

people

Use synonyms

are doing

well Paid

Add a hyphen

well-Paid

show examples

jobs.

In addition

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

, to

fulfill

Change the spelling

fulfil

show examples

the basic requirements of

family

Add an article

the family

a family

show examples

such

Linking Words

as shelter, food, clothes, so that they can stay comfortable in life, it is possible only if they are earning well. Other components are

also

Linking Words

mandatory when

person

Add an article

a person

the person

show examples

is selecting

occupation

Add an article

an occupation

show examples

. Primarily, colleagues relationships, if employees have good interpersonal relationships at

work place

Correct your spelling

workplace

show examples

, they can easily seek help from coworkers to complete their task ,which leads to less burden on

single

Add an article

a single

show examples

employee. Secondarily,

Correct article usage

show examples

comfortable working

environment

Use synonyms

also

Linking Words

important

factors

Fix the agreement mistake

factor

show examples

for workers, in order to stay free from stress proper working

environment

Use synonyms

is necessary

such

Linking Words

as adequate lighting, space and privacy.

Also

Linking Words

, many

people

Use synonyms

pay attention to working hours

instead

Linking Words

of only monetary, so that they can spend Quality time with family and friends . To conclude,

although

Linking Words

sufficient income is

main

Add an article

the main

show examples

motive of every employee for

security

Add an article

the security

show examples

of their family;

however

Linking Words

others

Correct quantifier usage

other

show examples

factors are

also

Linking Words

equally important like

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

comfortable working

environment

Use synonyms

and hours.

Submitted by Sohandeepkaur9327 on Wed Sep 29 2021

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Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
21
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

258 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

financial stability
job satisfaction
fulfillment
mental health
aligns with
productive career
career progression
growth potential
work-life balance
flexible hours
telecommuting
vacation time
professional responsibilities
working environment
corporate culture
toxic environment
stress and burnout

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Some people think that people should choose their job based on income in order to provide security for their family . Do you think money is an important factor when choosing a job?What other factors should be considered?

Your opinion

People in many countries are spending more and more time away from their families. Why is this happening? How does this affect people and their families? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your knowledge or experience.

Research shows that overeating can be just as harmful as smoking. Thus the advertising of certain food products should be banned, as cigar is banned in many countries. Do you agree or disagree?

More and more wild animals are on the verge of extinction and others are on the endangered list. What are the causes. What can be done to solve this problem

Differences between countries become less evident each year. Nowadays, all over the world people share the same advertising, brands, eating habits and TV channels. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages of these fashions?

your friend is taking an exam and has asked to you help him/her with studying because he/she knows that you usually do well. write a letter to your friend. In your letter * Tell him /her how you study *Give him /her on advice about the week before the exam. * Explain what to do on the day

your friend is taking an exam and has asked to you help him/her with studying because he/she knows that you usually do well. write a letter to your friend. In your letter * Tell him /her how you study Give him /her on advice about the week before the exam. Explain what to do on the day