IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Some people believe that cell phones should be for personal use only; others, however, feel cell phones should be used mostly for work.​ Discuss both views and give your own opinion. ​

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Nowadays, telephones have become an indispensable thing for every person.Because of
this
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, many people began to discuss that cell phones should only be used for personal purposes. While others think that they are needed only for
use
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 while working in the office.
This
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 essay will discuss
both
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 points of opinion. On the one hand, now it is very difficult to imagine life without a telephone, since every day we
use
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 it for personal
goal
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goals
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.Starting in the morning, we
use
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 an app from our
phone
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 for an alarm clock.
Moreover
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, some notes when there is no pen and paper with us, we write to a special application.They are
also
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 needed in order to stay in touch with friends and order a taxi in programs.
For instance
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, supplement
such
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“Yandex
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as “Yandex
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 Go”, “inDriver” and etc.
used
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are used
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 frequently.
On the other hand
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, employees
use
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 phones to talk to customers or to other staff.
Additionally
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, it applies them to send information in their message.
Although
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 the ability to call family members from the
phone
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 is an advantage, sometimes they can distract from work and disrupt the workflow. In conclusion, discussing
both
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 points of view, we can conclude that
both
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 for personal and office purposes, the
phone
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 are necessary.
In addition
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, it is necessary to balance the time spent on the
phone
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 in order to cope with
both
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 personal and work affairs.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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