In today’s competitive world, many families find it necessary for both parents go out to work. While some say the children in these families benefit from the additional income, others feel they lack support because of their parents’ absence. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Nowadays, most families find it necessary for both
parents
to do a job to meet the demands of their
life
. A chunk of individuals opines that
this
will ease the
life
of their
children
whilst others are sceptical about it. I;
however
, believe that
presence
Correct article usage
the presence
show examples
of
parents
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
vital
Add an article
a vital
show examples
part in the
teenagers
Change to a genitive case
teenager's
teenagers'
show examples
life
.
To begin
with,
children
who come from families where both
parents
work, lead to comfortable lifestyle
such
as they have
luxury
Change the article
the luxury
show examples
to travel due to extra money.
For instance
,
father‘s
Correct article usage
the father‘s
show examples
income
pay
Change the verb form
pays
show examples
the house expenses, the
mother’s
Change the noun form
mothers
mother
show examples
can be used for extra-curricular activities or other luxuries.
Moreover
, both working
parents
provide better educational opportunities as these
children
have access to advanced technology gadgets and can hire personal tutors for subjects they find incomprehensible.
Lastly
, families whose basic demands are met and have
Add an article
a
show examples
stable income,
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
lead a happy lifestyle .
Hence
,
this
will help to create a strong family bond.
On the other hand
,
parents
are
Correct pronoun usage
who are
show examples
so busy
to achieve
Change the verb form
achieving
show examples
their financial goals
are
Correct pronoun usage
that are
show examples
often left with no time to spend with their
children
.
For
instance
Add a comma
,instance
show examples
after a hectic day at work
parents
are exhausted and go straight to bed for rest . There is no time to guide and look after their
children
demands or needs.
This
problem
lead
Change the verb form
leads
show examples
children
to seek advice from Their peers or television or sometimes they have even
join
Change the verb form
joined
show examples
a gang,
this
increase the rate of school dropouts.
Hence
,
balance
Add an article
the balance
a balance
show examples
between family and work is mandatory for the well-being of the
children
. In conclusion, a luxurious
life
is not sufficient
children
need their
parents
Change to a genitive case
parent's
parents'
show examples
guidance and support as they grow. It is the responsibility of the
parents
to look after the behaviour of their
children
and guide them
accordingly
.
Submitted by jotjeet9 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • dual-income households
  • financial stability
  • work-life balance
  • emotional well-being
  • parental involvement
  • social development
  • extracurricular activities
  • childcare solutions
  • time management
  • career advancement
What to do next:
Look at other essays: