Our personalities are predetermined as a result of our genes before we are born and there is nothing that can be done to change our character traits. To what extent do you agree?

#personalities #genes #change #character #traits

It is commonly believed that human characters are based on genes before birth and personality traits can not be changed whatsoever. I disagree with the given statement and there are two reasons why I think so and they will be explained in the

few paragraphs.

First

of all, genetic influence is

internal

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an internal

show examples

factor and intense. It is a

well known

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well-known

show examples

fact that genes are

important

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an important

show examples

factor in human beings in every activity as it

detrmines

Correct your spelling

determines

the future course of the action by a person.

Although

some

gentic

Correct your spelling

genetic

features are driven by external factors and can be controlled to a larger extent.

For instance

sharp

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the sharp

show examples

memory of a person is mostly an

inheritent

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inheritance

inherited

inherent

feature

however

it can

also

be altered by means of

good

Correct article usage

a good

show examples

eating pattern. In short, genetic behaviour

are

Change the verb form

show examples

strong and can be modified over a period of time.

Secondly

scientific technological

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scientific-technological

show examples

advancemet

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advancement

advancements

can help acquire new human behaviour. Undoubtedly, with the enhancement in the

research

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,research

show examples

it is now possible for people to experience

new

Add an article

a new

show examples

form

Fix the agreement mistake

forms

show examples

of behaviour in the present time.

Although

it is a lengthy process to get the desired results. To

illustarte

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illustrate

, communities

which

Correct pronoun usage

that

show examples

faced the problem of bipolar disorder earlier can now overcome

this

issue by medication and

counciling

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counselling

Therefore

good

Change preposition

with good

show examples

healthcare facilities and better medicines it is possible to face the heredity

challanges

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challenges

challenge

which was only a dream couple of decades ago. In conclusion,

although

people's personalities

are strongly influence

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are strongly influenced

show examples

by parental factors

Correct pronoun usage

they

show examples

can be monitored by both environmental factors and better medication.

Submitted by rahat on Sun Oct 03 2021

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
21Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

251 words

6.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

predetermined
character traits
genetic influence
environmental factors
personality development
upbringing
foundation
evolution of traits

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Art is considered an essential part of all cultures throughout the world. However, these days fewer and fewer people appreciate art and turn their focus to science, technology, and business. Why do you think that is? What could be done to encourage more people to take interest in the arts?

Schools are spending more time teaching traditional subjects such as history. Some people think they should rather spend more time in teaching skills that can help students find a job. To what extent do you agree or disagree?