Schools are spending more time teaching traditional subjects such as history. Some people think they should rather spend more time in teaching skills that can help students find a job. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#schools #time #subjects #history #people #skills #students #job

The importance of

traditional

Add an article

the traditional

show examples

subject

which was always debatable has now become more controversial few

poeple

Correct your spelling

people

claiming that it is beneficial while others reject

this

notoin

Correct your spelling

notion

,the

subtantial

Correct your spelling

substantial

influence of

this

trend has sparked the controversy over the potential impact recent years.I fully agree which

this

statement that teachers should give more time

Change preposition

show examples

other

Change the wording

another subject

other subjects

show examples

subject

which will be more rational for

students

. In

further

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the further

show examples

essay

Add a comma

,essay

show examples

we will discuss more. Analyzing the

statment

Correct your spelling

statement

and explaining

further

, the

first

amd

Correct your spelling

and

foremost reason behind

this

is that

history

is not advantageous because

historyis

Correct your spelling

history is

history

too less future scope

as well as few

Add the comma(s)

, as well as few students,

show examples

students

find it boring so they

are not take

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do not take

show examples

intrust in

this

subject

as a

result

Add the comma(s)

,result

show examples

they failed in that type of

subject

For example

, shown in a study that

history

subject

is useless after schooling in university no

ine

Correct your spelling

one

take it seriously. Probing ahead,one of main underlying reason steam

fron

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from

the face is that nowadays

students

more likely to study advance technology rather than boring

subject

no want to learn

history

as well as some children

Add the comma(s)

, as well as some children,

show examples

believe that if they choose

history

ao they will not get

good

Change the article

a good

show examples

job and higher salary their parents think the same,and nowadays competition is too high because of time waste in that

subject

student would face difficulty in their future. To conclude,teachers should teach

students

advance

Add the particle

to advance

show examples

technology because it will

be help

Change the verb form

help

show examples

them to get a good job and better life in future.

Submitted by nehagusain045 on Sun Oct 03 2021

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Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
20Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

236 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Schools are spending more time teaching traditional subjects such as history. Some people think they should rather spend more time in teaching skills that can help students find a job. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

lnterviews form the basic selecting criteria for most large companies. However, some people think that interview is not a reliable method of choosing whom lo employ and there are other better methods. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

Directors of large organizations earn much higher salaries than ordinary employees do. Some people believe it is necessary, but others think that it is unfair. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

Many people argue that restaurants should be required to disclose the nutritional information of the dishes they serve. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantage?

Some people think that online reading materials are better for children. Others argues that traditional paper based resources are better. Discuss and give your opinion

Some prefer hobbies that require technology while other people prefer hobbies that don't require technology. Discuss both views and give your opinion.