Today, the life expectancy of people is much higher than before. Some people think that older should continue to be involved in the workplace. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
It is undoubtedly if the basic needs in
life
significantly increase than the past.
Thus
, several
people
argue that elderly
people
should be worked to fulfil their necessities.
However
, I disagree with
this
notion because of the retirement incentive law and
health
matters. In
this
era, most human utilities are getting pricey than several years ago. Clearly, it is caused by the production costs and
also
the demand. Obviously, it will influence the
life
expectancy of
people
since they have to continue their own
life
.
For example
, education,
health
care, and accommodation are more costly.
Therefore
, many
people
realized if whether you are young or old, you still need to be employed and paid.
On the other hand
, several countries
also
have a retirement law for the aged
people
that should be retired before the targeted age.
For instance
, in Indonesia, elderly
people
above 60 years old will get their pension fund. Not only that, but they
also
get free public facilities from the government,
such
as transportation tickets, hospital access, and assurance. From
this
point, it is clear that they still can continue their
life
without work.
Moreover
, the more someone is getting older, the more their body is reducing the energy. It means, they have to take care of their
health
since they become weak. So, involving in work at old age is not a good idea.
Firstly
, it is because their performance will not optimal during the activities.
Also
, hard-working will lead them to the
health
hazard. In conclusion, it is not utilized for the elderly
people
to continue their work since all of their needs will be covered by the incentive from the government, and
also
they have to focus more on their
health
.
Submitted by faradienaf on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: