Today, the life expectancy of people is much higher than before. Some people think that older should continue to be involved in the workplace. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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It is undoubtedly if the basic needs in

life

Use synonyms

significantly increase than the past.

Thus

Linking Words

, several

people

Use synonyms

argue that elderly

people

Use synonyms

should be worked to fulfil their necessities.

However

Linking Words

, I disagree with

this

Linking Words

notion because of the retirement incentive law and

health

Use synonyms

matters. In

this

Linking Words

era, most human utilities are getting pricey than several years ago. Clearly, it is caused by the production costs and

also

Linking Words

the demand. Obviously, it will influence the

life

Use synonyms

expectancy of

people

Use synonyms

since they have to continue their own

life

Use synonyms

For example

Linking Words

, education,

health

Use synonyms

care, and accommodation are more costly.

Therefore

Linking Words

, many

people

Use synonyms

realized if whether you are young or old, you still need to be employed and paid.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, several countries

also

Linking Words

have a retirement law for the aged

people

Use synonyms

that should be retired before the targeted age.

For instance

Linking Words

, in Indonesia, elderly

people

Use synonyms

above 60 years old will get their pension fund. Not only that, but they

also

Linking Words

get free public facilities from the government,

such

Linking Words

as transportation tickets, hospital access, and assurance. From

this

Linking Words

point, it is clear that they still can continue their

life

Use synonyms

without work.

Moreover

Linking Words

, the more someone is getting older, the more their body is reducing the energy. It means, they have to take care of their

health

Use synonyms

since they become weak. So, involving in work at old age is not a good idea.

Firstly

Linking Words

, it is because their performance will not optimal during the activities.

Also

Linking Words

, hard-working will lead them to the

health

Use synonyms

hazard. In conclusion, it is not utilized for the elderly

people

Use synonyms

to continue their work since all of their needs will be covered by the incentive from the government, and

also

Linking Words

they have to focus more on their

health

Use synonyms

faradienafMon Oct 04 2021

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

288 words

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Today, the life expectancy of people is much higher than before. Some people think that older should continue to be involved in the workplace. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Car ownership has increased so rapidly over the past thirty years that many cities in the world are now ‘one big traffic jam’. How true do you think this statement is? What measures can governments take to discourage from using their cars?

People are encouraged to get rid of things in order to get newest fashion and the latest Technology.Do the disadvantage of this trend outweigh its advantage.

More and more plastic waste is polluting cities, countrysides and oceans on the world. What problems does it cause? What are the solutions?

Some schools are very strict about their school uniforms and the appearance of their students, while other schools have a very relaxed dress code. What are the advantages and disadvantages of children of having a school uniform?

Although more and more people read news on the Internet, newspapers will remain the most important source of news. Do you agree or disagree?