In many places, people’s lifestyle is changing rapidly, and this affects family relationships. Do you think the advantages of those developments outweigh the disadvantages? bring both positive and negative effects

#places #people’s #lifestyle #relationships #developments #effects

As a result

of people’s

lifestyle

Fix the agreement mistake

lifestyles

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changing rapidly, family

relationships

are affected in many places. In my personal opinion, those developments have both positive and negative effects. On the one hand, the rapid changing of people’s

lifestyle

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lifestyles

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brings its own benefits to family

relationships

Firstly

, in a modern

social

Replace the word

society

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where feminist is coming to be promoted, family

relationships

also

become more equal that the fathers no longer has the right to hurt or disrespect the mothers.

Therefore

, the children living in those houses do not have to see the scenes which might be their sad memories throughout their lives.

Secondly

, nowadays, technological devices are developed as well as mobile phones are invented, members in a family can make communication with the others easier, especially those who are separated in long distance.

This

situation helps members

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families keep in touch and be closer wherever they are.

On the other hand

, those developments have some disadvantages to family

relationships

Although

modern technology brings positive effects, it

also

causes gaps between

generations

. Social platforms and the internet being popular make the younger generation able to approach different cultures around the world, while older

generations

have less chance to communicate with their young adults. These

generations

do not have the same experiences or viewpoints to discuss or understand each other.

In addition

, the younger

generations

now rather spend time on boosting career prospects than marriage and building family feelings, their time for families becoming less than before weakened family

relationships

. In conclusion, lifestyles changing rapidly has both positive and negative effects on family memberships. People’s

relationship

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relationships

show examples

Change preposition

with

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

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other members can be improved by balancing between social life and family life.

Submitted by bhnguyen.21298 on Tue Oct 05 2021

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Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

278 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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In many places, people’s lifestyle is changing rapidly, and this affects family relationships. Do you think the advantages of those developments outweigh the disadvantages? bring both positive and negative effects

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

What are the advantages and disadvantages for children of watching televizion?

In some countries, more and more people are becoming interested in finding out about the history of the house or building they live in. What are the reasons for this?How can people research this?

Many criminals commit further crimes as soon as they are released from prison. What do you think are the causes of this? What effect will this have on society?

In many countires there is a problem with declining quality of air and water from both industry and construction. what measures could be taken to prevent this.