When a town is planned, it is more important to develop public parks and sports facilities than shopping centers for people to spend their free time in. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#town #parks #sports #facilities #centers #people #time

In a modern town, many argue that public parks and sports establishments are crucial and are more important than shopping

malls

. I partially disagree with

this

statement, as I believe that shopping markets are equally important to public parks and exercise facilities. In the following essay, we will discuss the reasons to support my cause. The development of recreations

centres

in the city is proved to be imperative.

First

of all,

such

social establishments will be a place of people gatherings to work out and to play or practise their sports activities. And because of

such

incidents

Add a comma

,incidents

show examples

every member can connect with each other either through games or just by talking with one another.

As a result

, the town residents can improvise their relationship with the local communities and

this

will lead to a healthy community.

Therefore

, the prospects of having

such

social

centres

are higher. Even though, having

such

exercising and social establishments would be beneficial. I would like to point out the importance of having shopping

malls

Firstly

, shopping

centres

are convenient for the inhabitants to purchase all necessities in one place and

also

to transport them with less effort and at a lower cost.

Secondly

, the shopping centre will provide employment for the locals. Locals can get jobs at the retail, security or maintenance to the mall.

Thus

, through

malls

locals can economically support the family. In conclusion, I reiterate that from the above essay it is clear the shopping

malls

are equally important as a gym and recreational

centres

as it proved to be convenient and provides opportunities to the city inhabitants.

Submitted by richvinleon00 on Mon Oct 11 2021

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

267 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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When a town is planned, it is more important to develop public parks and sports facilities than shopping centers for people to spend their free time in. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Write advantages and disadvantages of co-education.

Your friend has a travel company and would like you to come and work with him. Write a letter replying to your friend's offer. In your letter: •explain what you know about your friend's company •choose whether you accept or decline the offer •give reasons for your choice

Some people believe that in order to improve educational quality, we should encourage students to make comments or even criticism on their teachers, but others think it will lead to the loss of respect and discipline in the classroom. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?