Some people think that people every nation should concentrate on agriculture to develop. Others think that other developments are more important. What is your opinion?

Besides
other unfolding events ,husbandry is key to the
growth
of any
economy
in the world.
This
comes along with a satisfied and
Add a hyphen
well-nourished
show examples
well nourished
Add a hyphen
well-nourished
show examples
community. Agronomics is considered is a source of revenue,source of employment
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
its people
thus
reducing
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
poverty levels.
Firstly
, Agriculture is key to the
growth
and development of the
economy
this
is because it plays a big role in nations revenue, developing countries still depend on agricultural exports and
by products
Add a hyphen
by-products
show examples
to boost their
economy
, like production of raw materials
this
Change the determiner
these
show examples
raw materials are very useful in
processing
Add an article
the processing
show examples
of pharmaceuticals ,fuel among others
such
that the
economy
will depend on the number of raw materials it posses.
For
instance
Add a comma
,instance
show examples
molasses is a
by product
Add a hyphen
by-product
show examples
of sugar and is healthy for human consumption and carries massive benefits.
On the other hand
,incorporating other sources of revenue collection is crucial, a country cannot depend solely on agriculture for expansion, things like tourism earns huge returns.
This
in return creates employment opportunities and dependency.
For
example
Add a comma
,example
show examples
it is estimated that the number of tourists visiting Kenya every year is over 500 thousand ,and
gross
Add an article
the gross
show examples
domestic product is at 4.4percent
this
alone combined with agribusiness is a factor for advancement.
Therefore
both local and international tourism should be encouraged and local, international advertisement is encouraged to aid in
growth
.
Finally
, in my own view, being keen on agribusiness will factor in
growth
and development but
combination
Add an article
the combination
a combination
show examples
of other sources of wealth generation will boost the
economy
further
. but the reality is that every country in the world depends on agriculture for one thing or another.
Submitted by Estherwanjohi17 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: