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Writing Samples
Band 4

We have long imagined the possibility that life exists on other planets . Do you believe that there is life in the universe outside of earth? What would be the implications of proving that alien life exists? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience.

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Introduction
With the pace of 21st-century
technology
Punctuation problem
technology,
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is
Wrong verb form
it has
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lept
Verb problem
leapfrogged
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 to
the
Correct article usage
a
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 level which was unimaginable a few decades ago .
Due to
Linking Words
 the advancement in technology , we all start to believe that there is life
existence
Check wording
apply
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on other planets .
Linking Words
According to
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In
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 my opinion , I think that there is existence on the other globe , there are many ways to prove that there are creatures
out of
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outside
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 the globe .
Body paragraph 1
Nevertheless
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, there is much evidence provided by our scientists , there is survival on another planet.
For instance
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 , as our scientists went to the moon for their research , they
find
Wrong verb form
found
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 a footprint of any creature they took a picture and
sample
Correct article usage
a sample
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 of that to the earth .
Moreover
Linking Words
, even though after much research on the planets , they took more steps towards the success of their goal .
Body paragraph 2
There are many points to give proof that
aliens
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alien
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 activity exists. First and foremost ,
By
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by
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 doing more and more
researches
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research
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. To illustrate , if the researchers do many and more
Fix the agreement mistake
research
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researches
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researches,
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 like they check the oxygen , gravity and so on , they will be able to prove that there is
the
Correct article usage
apply
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survival on another planet .
In addition
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 , make suitable devices .
For example
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 , in spite of doing research , the equipment should be suitable and more effective , the outcome can be
more strong
Correct word choice
stronger
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 and effective .
Conclusion
In conclusion , even though by the proofs given by researchers we come to know that there is life
out of
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beyond
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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earth
Fix capitalization
Earth
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, if they find
more
Punctuation problem
more,
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 they will be able to give a strong point regarding
this
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. I totally believe that there is growth on another planet
and
Punctuation problem
, and
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 many points
are there
Verb problem
exist
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 to prove
this
Linking Words
 statement.

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structure
Plan your essay. Start with a clear intro, then 2 or 3 ideas, then a short ending.
accuracy
Use true facts. If you talk about things like footprints on the Moon, be sure they are real or say what scientists think.
cohesion
Make one idea in one paragraph. Use words like first, also, but, so to tie ideas.
grammar
Check grammer and spelling. Simple words in top 100 list help readers.
content
The writer shows a wish to discuss life on other worlds.
coherence
Some use of linking words and a hint of order in ideas.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • vastness
  • statistical probability
  • habitable planets
  • Drake Equation
  • extremophiles
  • hydrothermal vents
  • monumental
  • resilience
  • adaptability
  • philosophical
  • human-centric viewpoints
  • interstellar
  • cosmos
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