IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Many people are doing their shopping on the internet nowadays. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of shopping online and give your opinion.

#people #internet
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Technology has been flourishing by leaps in every area of life, and shopping is not an exception. We can buy anything with a few mouse clicks in the comfort home, and they provide an easy way to
payment
 ,
however
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,however
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 it can be impulsive buying . There are
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
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myriad benefits associated with shopping online.
Firstly
, accessibility to buy products which can not be found in the nearest store. People can reach anything without physically going, they can
shopping
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shop
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 at home, which
lead
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leads
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 to saving precious time.
Moreover
, online platforms support multiple
payment
Change to a plural noun
payments
show examples
Correct quantifier usage
apply
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such
, give people the convenience to buy. To illustrate
this
, in 2021 the users of Tokopedia, one of the leading application
store
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stores
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 in Indonesia, increasing more
significantly
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sign
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 up to 30%. Consumers of Korean fashion
product
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products
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 are the most buyer. They can buy Korean clothes without having to go
South
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to South
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 Korea. Tokopedia
also
provide
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provides
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 BNPL (Buy Now Pay Later) , so that the consumer which does not have money can pay it
in
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at
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 another time. Admittedly,
the
Correct article usage
apply
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hedonic shopping is
undesirable
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an undesirable
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 consequence of e-commerce’s buyers.
Customer
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The customer
A customer
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 has a tendency to buy goods and services without planning in advance, cause an overspending and
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
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rising debts. E-commerce growth followed by the
increasing
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increase
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 of digital
payment
 has encouraged the penetration of
payment
 features that aims to attract
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
consumers. The current phenomenon in Indonesia is the existence of pay later features. Pay later system requires a minimum purchase of
certain
Change the article
a certain
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 amount , make them buy the higher price and unnecessary products.
However
,
this
 digital
payment
 feature has unexpected outcomes
charactarized
Correct your spelling
characterized
characterised
 by increased default. To sum up, buying something on the internet can reduce the mobilization , save time, and has many
option
Change to a plural noun
options
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 to pay , in spite of
hedonic
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the hedonic
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 character of buyers.
Submitted by mellindanur.octavia on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • E-commerce
  • Consumer behavior
  • Virtual marketplace
  • Cybersecurity
  • Digital footprint
  • Return policy
  • Comparison shopping
  • Customer reviews
  • Retail therapy
  • Logistics
  • User interface
  • Payment gateway
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