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Band 4

In some countries, an increasing number of people are suffering from health problem as a result of eating too much fast food. It is therefore, necessary for government to impose a higher tax on this kind of food. To what extent, do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#countries #people #health #food #government #tax
The fact that imposing higher taxation is one of the best ways to fix the problem of
health related
Add a hyphen
health-related
show examples
 to fast
food
 is true. I reckon that it is a solution and I agree with
this
statement
. The majority of people are facing the impact of feeding on too much fast
food
. The
first
 good point of the declaration is that the companies of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
fast
Add a hyphen
fast-food
show examples
food
 may aware of the high tax and strict rules, so they may upgrade the quality concerned with health.
This
 is clearly more appropriate for health and fitness than the former. Some may
also
 hesitate to produce unhealthy fast
food
 because of the awareness of
the
Change the word
their
show examples
 disadvantages
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
them
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
. They might
also
 increase the price of their products to get a considerable profit since they have to pay higher
taxation
Replace the word
taxes
show examples
 to the government. The consumers will
also
 think carefully to buy convenient canned
food
 and others since they become a little pricey. It is obvious that fast
food
 is bought because of the cheap price tag and how it is easy to eat. After the overtaxing
statement
released
Add a missing verb
is released
show examples
 by the government, the customers may not buy
those
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
as much as before the
statement
.
This
 is considered to be a good outcome. If they know the reasons behind
this
, they might be reminded about the drawbacks of those unhealthy ones because of the regulations and announcements of weighty taxation. To conclude, the production industries of fast
food
 may fix the quality of it. The buyers may
also
 reflect
the
Change preposition
on the
show examples
 bad points of it and reduce eating it as much as they can. Because of these merits, I agree with
this
statement
.
Submitted by kyarnyo512 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Overconsumption
  • Chronic diseases
  • Obesity
  • Diabetes
  • Cardiovascular health
  • Sin tax
  • Subsidize
  • Affordability
  • Nutritional awareness
  • Paternalism
  • Socio-economic disparities
  • Industry lobbying
  • Public health initiatives
  • Consumer behavior
  • Regulatory measures
  • Health-conscious
  • Processed foods
  • Fiscal policy
  • Preventative healthcare
  • Behavioral economics
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