IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The crime rate nowadays is decreasing compared to the past due to advance technology which can prevent and solve crime. To what extent do you agree?

#crime #rate #advance #technology
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It is true that
,
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apply
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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modern
technology
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 assists to reduce illegal activities around the world
compare
Wrong verb form
compared
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 to primitive
time
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times
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.
Technology
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 can help to find
effective
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the effective
an effective
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 solving
process
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processes
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 by providing
more
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a more
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 efficient way of working. I partially agree with
this
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 statement as well
as
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apply
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, I will give some reasons
of
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for
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this
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 notion.
To begin
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 with, the predominant reason why people favour artificial intelligence like
,
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apply
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 CCTV, screener, biometric machine, became the legal authorities track down the movements of lawbreakers. For
this
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 reason, the state and the police have installed surveillance cameras on
the
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apply
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important places that
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are helpful
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helpful
Replace the word
help
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 to
stopped
Wrong verb form
stop
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 worse
incident
Fix the agreement mistake
incidents
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 before
it
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they
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 take place.
For example
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, in Indian government planted CCTV cameras
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therefore
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,therefore
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, the rape and
other
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another
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 harassment rate is going fall.
As a result
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, the offenders
are now feel
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are now feeling
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 afraid to attempt any crimes.
However
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,
on the other hand
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, there are a couple of drawbacks of
this
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 advancement of
technology
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, which leads to
do
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doing
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 advance level illegal acts.
In addition
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, hacking is one of them because
,
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apply
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the
hackers
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hacker's
hackers'
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stolen
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stole
have stolen
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 valuable information and data and
also
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 money.
For instance
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, few years
a back
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aback
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,
in
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apply
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Bangladesh lost 500 million dollars from
reserve
Correct article usage
the reserve
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 bank
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apply
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with in
Correct your spelling
within
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 time
thus
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, the delinquents used high tech computers .
Furthermore
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, digital offenders
blackmailed
Wrong verb form
blackmail
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 people and earn money
this
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only
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is only
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 possible
because
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ofbecause
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 easy access
of
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to
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 information. To sum up, it is undeniable truth new artificial
technology
Use synonyms
 help people to get justice in a short time as well as
easy
Add an article
an easy
the easy
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 way to collect data of any lawbreakers but we cannot deny the side effects of it.
Submitted by mahmuduts on

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • surveillance cameras
  • advanced security systems
  • potential criminals
  • law enforcement
  • AI (artificial intelligence)
  • big data analytics
  • forensic science
  • public awareness
  • social media
  • online platforms
  • crime prevention
  • crime rates
  • counterargument
  • cybercrime
  • technological misconduct
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