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Some feel that schools should be mixed with both girls and boys attending while others feel the genders ought to be separated. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

#feel #schools #girls #boys #genders
In the present day, the methods and systems of education are a primary concern in any society.
While
 some people believe that boys and girls ought to study in the same ambience, others claim that they should be separated. I tend to agree with the former. Because, from my point of view, the advantages of mixed
schools
 outweigh
disadvantages
Correct article usage
the disadvantages
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 since the relationship between both can build better human beings. On the one hand, some individuals believe mixed
schools
 are a remarkable option since through them the interaction among students is much better. Resulting in more options of learning which involves the differences.
Furthermore
,
this
 type of educational system can provide pupils, who study together, independent of the genders, a sense of belonging.
In other words
, the acquaintanceship between women and men can endorse positively the differences and new and different knowledge.
On the other hand
, some people claim separated
schools
 are a great option as they can help girls become more confident without
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
male pressure.
Moreover
, boys can develop their artistic side without
they felt
Wrong verb form
feeling
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 shame
with
Change preposition
in
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 the presence of the female sex.
In other words
, the separated
schools
 can contribute to ameliorating of specialities. In a society so patriarchal, the presence of women more independent, and with self-awareness of their power is essential to building a better place. As far as I am concerned,
schools
 ought to be mixed since
this
 way students can contribute to the improvement of abilities of each other.
In addition
, girls and boys studying together is a reality much closer to the real world. In a fast-paced world is necessary to learn to live
together with
 the differences since they exist everywhere. Learning about the problems and current issues is a great idea to try to address them with respect and responsibility. In conclusion, education systems have
been
Unnecessary verb
apply
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changed over the years and from time to time, changes are necessary to improve and alter some ideas about a specific topic. Mixed
schools
 are the best option for students to evolve as human beings since they will learn from a variety of cultures and thoughts.
Submitted by larissafelipin on

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coherence cohesion
In your essay, the logical structure is sometimes unclear. Ensure that your ideas are presented in a clear and organized manner, with each paragraph flowing logically into the next.
task achievement
You have addressed the task and presented a clear response. Make sure to fully explore both views in a balanced way and provide specific examples to support your points.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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