Many people Today find it difficult to balance the demands of their work and personal life what are the causes of the situation and what kind individuals and employers do to reduce the problem

These days
work
Add a hyphen
work-life
show examples
life
balance is
such
a difficult issue
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
people
in
this
era due to the fact that the rising cost of living and
also
the atmosphere of competition at
work place
Correct your spelling
workplace
show examples
.
However
, we should seek a solution for
this
problem by saving more
money
and
make
Wrong verb form
making
show examples
relaxing
Correct article usage
a relaxing
show examples
vibe at the company.
To begin
with, there are many factors that can affect the
balace
Correct your spelling
balance
of
carreer
Correct your spelling
career
life
and personal
life
.
Accorrding
Correct your spelling
According
to the high cost of living,
people
have to earn
money
by working harder and harder, which make
they
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
gain more income,
consequently
, The time that will be left for their own or family is running out.
Moreover
, there is
also
the competitive
atmostphere
Correct your spelling
atmosphere
in the workplace that can ruin their work-
life
balance, the employers must do their best for the jobs to get the promotion which means the advancement
in
Correct your spelling
is
show examples
carreer
Correct your spelling
career
life
.
Nevertheless
, society
need
Change the verb form
needs
show examples
to get rid of
this
problem by
encoraging
Correct your spelling
encouraging
people
to save more
money
and spend less on
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
unneeded
Change the wording
stuff
kinds of stuff
pieces of stuff
show examples
stuffs
Correct your spelling
stuff
show examples
.
This
attitude would help them to have more time
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
thier
Correct your spelling
their
her
personal
life
since they would have enough
incomes
Fix the agreement mistake
income
show examples
for paying the significant bills.
Furthermore
, the employers are
also
the key factor of
solution
Add an article
the solution
a solution
show examples
, they should create a friendly environment in the company
such
as decreasing the gap between boss and employers or between the
collegues
Correct your spelling
colleagues
, which will make the tension at workplace decline, so
people
can have a more relaxing or leisure time with their family or friends. In conclusion, even we find it tough to have a nice balance between work
life
and personal
life
due to the cost of living and high competition in the company, our society can release
this
tension by
encorage
Correct your spelling
encourage
people
to save more
money
and create a relaxing
atmostphere
Correct your spelling
atmosphere
at
workplace
Add an article
the workplace
show examples
.
Submitted by 180nam.r405 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: