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Writing Samples
Band 8

Many adults nowadays prefer spending their free time playing computer games. Why do they do this? Is this a positive or negative development?

#adults #time #computer #games #development
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It is for a few decades now that the gaming industry started to become a gigantic multi-billion dollar industry around the globe as the crowd love to spend their leisure period playing those
games
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, and are willing to pay more for their wishlist items. From my perspective, there are two reasons why the crowd prefer to use their leisure period on
PC
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 gaming including their variety and relaxation.
Computer
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 game gives the most matching personal preference due to their variety. As
PC
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games
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 can be created by anyone and sell them in gaming stores like Stream or Epic Game, people can choose more
games
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 to match their personal taste.
Moreover
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, as
computer
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 gaming is the
first
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 gaming platform connecting to the internet, its development in number outmatched other gaming platforms like VR or smartphones. Due to the advancement of
PC
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 gaming, its performance is better than other gaming platforms in many ways.
For instance
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, the mechanic of using a mouse and keyboard is more reliable than a joystick or smartphone screen as the designs can be changed depending on their player's playing styles. It can be done through both screen settings and physical elements of the mouse and keyboard.
Consequently
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, it gives people more consistency and accuracy in playing their
games
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, which creates joy and relaxation along the way while most other devices can not give.
However
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, spending several days playing
computer
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games
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 may damage gamers' physical health and social connection in the long term. Even though working with computers has taken most of the daily active hours already, the gaming community will love to play
PC
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games
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 a few more hours afterwards. These may cause damages to their backbone and eyesight as they have to spend several hours sitting in front of the screen. These may lead to bad posture, back pain, and shortening eyesight.
Furthermore
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, if the adults can not balance their virtual period and real-life properly, they may become more of an introverted personality unnoticeably, which will loosen or tear down some relationships like friends, colleges or even family. In conclusion, even though playing
computer
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games
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 offers variety and relaxation to adults, it causes them to be faced with physical health problems and social behaviour issues.
Therefore
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, people should manage their daily routine appropriately to not damage too much on their physical health and prevent long term social conflict.
Submitted by cocoa18214 on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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