IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Explain some of the ways in which humans are damaging the environment. What can governments do to address these problems? What can individual people do?

#humans #environment #governments #address #people
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The global climate is changed by human’s activities. There are many activities
affected
Correct pronoun usage
that affected
show examples
 on
environment
Add an article
the environment
show examples
such
Linking Words
 as
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 water contamination, air pollution and gas emission. As well,
that is
Linking Words
 a lot of actions from the government and other
organization
Fix the agreement mistake
organizations
show examples
 that
interested
Add a missing verb
are interested
show examples
about
Change preposition
in
show examples
 climate change, it will be a try to convert our future to be
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
bright for a new generation.
First
Linking Words
 of all,
people
Use synonyms
 should care and reconsider the usage of
own
Correct pronoun usage
their own
show examples
 cars because a lot of there are generate dioxide
emission
Fix the agreement mistake
emissions
show examples
 every day. That may solve the problem of air pollution.
Secondly
Linking Words
, recycling should be integrated into our
Correct your spelling
lifestyle
show examples
life style
Correct your spelling
lifestyle
show examples
such
Linking Words
 as in houses or
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
 work.
This
Linking Words
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
can solve some of
Add an article
the problem
show examples
problem
Fix the agreement mistake
problems
show examples
 with overconsumption with better approaches and technologies are developed.
Thirdly
Linking Words
, every person can clear
own
Correct pronoun usage
their own
show examples
 streets, public spaces or other areas from garbage to be a role model for other
people
Use synonyms
.
As a result
Linking Words
, the government should
to
Change the verb form
apply
show examples
spread
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
awareness
between
Change preposition
to
show examples
 a new generation by adding some topics
such
Linking Words
 as ways to
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
protect our planet and the importance of the global environment.
In addition
Linking Words
, individual societies can help to
attracting
Change the verb form
attract
show examples
 many of the voluntary to improve
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 quality of life for the communities.
Lastly
Linking Words
,
understand
Wrong verb form
understanding
show examples
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
people
Use synonyms
 for
importance
Add an article
the importance
show examples
 of using alternative sources of energy
such
Linking Words
 as wind
turbine
Fix the agreement mistake
turbines
show examples
, solar
panel
Fix the agreement mistake
panels
show examples
 and others should be encouraged. In conclusion,
this
Linking Words
 issue must be cooperation between a role of government and local organization to spend time for spread
a knowledge
Remove the article
knowledge
a piece of knowledge
show examples
 between all
people
Use synonyms
 in communities about reduce
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
power and understand them the
dangerous
Replace the word
dangers
show examples
 of climate change.
Submitted by arch.mohammedzaki on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.

You essay structure should look something like this:

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – Problems
  • Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • One of the first problems of the...
  • Another problem that needs to be considered...
  • A possible solution to this problem would be...
  • One immediate practical solution is to...

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Pollution: contamination, emissions, pollutants, industrial waste
  • Deforestation: habitat loss, biodiversity, urban development, logging
  • Climate Change: greenhouse gases, global warming, fossil fuels, renewable energy
  • Overfishing: unsustainable, fish stocks, marine ecosystems, conservation
  • Waste Production: non-biodegradable, plastics, recycling, waste management systems
What to do next:
Look at other essays: