Some people believe that part time job can ensure better job opportunities in future. Others think job can easily distract students from study. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

In the present day, there are presumptions
such
as having experience from a half-time job will add credibility to
resume
Correct article usage
a resume
show examples
which is useful while searching for
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
full-time duty.
However
, the rest contradict
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
it and say, doing so will deviate students from their education. In my opinion, I agree with both the statements but only to a certain extent because having knowledge about
few
Correct article usage
a few
show examples
things before itself is something that an employer wants but it could
also
become a factor for children to
perfom
Correct your spelling
perform
worse in the examinations.
To begin
with,
firstly
, the foremost advantage of working while
stuying
Correct your spelling
studying
is it adds weightage to
ones
Change to a genitive case
one's
show examples
own resume.
Secondly
, it helps them earn money which aids them to pay for their expenses and
consequently
, they need not depend on their parents and become financially independent.
Moreover
, it is a common
phenomena
Change the noun form
phenomenon
show examples
that is
happening at
great
Correct article usage
a great
show examples
phase currently all over the world. To illustrate it, my cousin who is pursuing his master's
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
abroad started doing night shift duties at a local cafe which pays him well.
Next
, it helped him
payoff
Correct your spelling
pay off
show examples
his tuition fees. So, it is definitely good to work but still needs
few
Correct article usage
a few
show examples
boundaries.
On the other hand
, the major con of it is humans tend to get carried
way
Correct your spelling
away
show examples
towards money and get distracted from their main goal.
Further
, work becomes so hectic in
such
a way that they are tended to neglect their education. Hereafter, they
perfom
Correct your spelling
perform
extremely worse in college and
subsequently
, they do get dismissed.
For example
, a friend of mine faced a
simialr
Correct your spelling
similar
scenario where he worked more than prescribed hours set by local law and studied less which ultimately made him
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
Correct your spelling
drop out
show examples
dropout
Correct your spelling
drop out
show examples
from
Change preposition
of
show examples
him
Change the pronoun
his
show examples
university.
Thus
, paving
path
Add an article
the path
a path
show examples
for his own destruction. In summary, working definitely has its pros when
follwed
Correct your spelling
followed
with a strategic plan but too
much
Change the quantifier
many
show examples
works
prevents
Change the verb form
prevent
show examples
us from achieving the primary aim.
Also
, one should consider everything well in advance and schedule time
accordingly
so that everything is balanced.
Submitted by manojvamc on

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • practical experience
  • time management
  • professional network
  • enhance a resume
  • distract
  • academic pursuits
  • poor time management
  • stress
  • burnout
  • academic achievements
  • balance work and study
  • career goals
  • support system
  • part-time employment
  • prospective employers
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