children today play very violent games. this must be the reason for the increase in violence and crime in most major cities of the world. what are your opinions on this?

#children #games #reason #violence #crime #cities #world

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There is no doubt that these days video

games

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are becoming common and play a considerable role in

children

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's routine. The question is, are violent

games

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the reason in

increase

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increasing

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rates of

crime

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and

violence

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in the most important and greatest of world cities? In

this

Linking Words

essay, I am going to discuss

this

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issue and draw my own conclusion. In terms of some views, most people, and among them is me, strongly believe it is too much to say that aggressive video

games

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are the cause of increased

crime

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in the world. The main reason given to support

this

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claim is that looking at the past centuries there have been a lot of constant wars and fighting with weapons and a lot of dangerous tools. To illustrate, those previous years for mankind show that training

children

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on the real killing and fighting

Change the verb form

are

show examples

tremendously crucial for strengthening

children

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's character and ability to protect themselves from enemies or enemies of the homeland.

In contrast

Linking Words

, most

children

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's fights at present are limited

Change preposition

show examples

virtual

games

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In other words

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, it is not

games

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that

making

Wrong verb form

make

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the

Correct article usage

apply

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global

violence

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and it can not be

children

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games

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that cause

Change preposition

apply

show examples

increase

crime

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However

Linking Words

on the other hand

Linking Words

, concern about

games

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violence

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leads to criminal acts.

Firstly

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, there is no doubt that violent

games

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have

impact

Add an article

an impact

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on kids' behaviour. In the other words,

the

Correct article usage

apply

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people who their age under 15 years old tend to imitate other persons especially if it is aggressive.

secondly

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, playing

games

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that promote

violence

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, result in

children

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being introverted.

This

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is because they play it several times and particularly when they play video

games

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, they just sit in front of the TV for a long time and without doing anything else useful. In conclusion,

although

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playing violent

games

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have unbelievable influences, it has many boons as well.

Therefore

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, I believe that the rise of brutality and

crime

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is not related

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show examples

children

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games

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, and there are other root causes that should be investigated.

Submitted by besho0h on Sun Oct 31 2021

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

331 words

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children today play very violent games. this must be the reason for the increase in violence and crime in most major cities of the world. what are your opinions on this?

You have just won two tickets to a concert and want to invite your friend to go with you. Write a letter to your friend. In the letter: give details about the concert describe how you won the tickets explain why you’ve chosen your friend to go with you.

“Modern forms of communication such as email and messaging have reduced the amount of time people spend seeing their friends. This has a negative effect on their social lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree?”

Problems with environmental pollution have become so serious that many countries are trying to solve these problems. Suggest possible solutions and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Some people buy new models of phones, computers and other technology immidately while others prefer to buy after a while they launch. disuss both views and give your opinion.