The growing number of overweight people is putting a strain on the helth care system in an effort to deal with the health issues involved. Some people think that the best way to deal with this problem to introduce more physical education lesson in the school curriculem. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

#people #strain #helth #care #system #effort #health #education #lesson #school #curriculem

Because the

increase

in the number of the overweight population put a lot of pressure on the healthcare system when going to handle the related issues with it. According to some, overcoming

this

issue is the best

way

to include physical activity lessons in

school

education.I strongly agreed that

this

is the best

way

to tackle

this

problem to avoid the unnecessary weight on the public

health

system.

Firstly

, to deal with the issues surrounding overweight and obesity is the long-lasting

way

is introduce more sport and

activities

during

school

time

This

will ensure to eliminate the

health

matters related to obesity from the future generation.On average the children in The USA have only two hours of activity

time

during

school

hours.

This

will not be enough to counteract their sedentary lifestyle. In

further

, need to

increase

the extracurricular

activities

in the curriculum.

Secondly

, With ,

increase

the sports

activities

in the

school

time

children will get more active and playful. At ,home their parents will involve with them to do the

activities

In other words

, children will be extended the physical

activities

to the home and their parents and encourage them to stay active. Undoubtedly It will

increase

elders activity

time

and improve their

health

. In conclusion, adding extracurricular

activities

to the

school

curriculum will be the best

way

to reduce the pressure on the

health

system owning to the growth of the overweight population.

Submitted by aselaraj on Mon Nov 01 2021

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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
6Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

8 paragraphs

235 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Fully explain your ideas

In some countries, more and more people are becoming interested in finding out about the history of the house or building they live in. What are the reasons for this? How can people research this?

in many countires nowadays, consumers can go to a supermarket and buy food produced all over tha world. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

The threat of nuclear weapons maintains world peace. Nuclear power provides cheap and Clean energy. The benefits of nuclear energy far outweigh the disadvantages. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people prefer to travel around town by car, while others prefer public transit such as bus, train, or subway. Discuss both these positions and give your own opinion.