Some people say that professional workers such as doctors, nurses and teachers who make greater contributions to society should be paid more than those people in the field of sports and entertainment. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Although
it is sometimes thought to pay a high amount of money
to professional workers, as they put more efforts
Fix the agreement mistake
effort
for
society, Change preposition
into
others
believed that sports and entertainment should be paid more. In my openion
, I considered that professional workers should be paid with high salary, but people in the sports and entertainment Correct your spelling
opinion
field
should not be neglacted
.
A good reason paying good Correct your spelling
neglected
money
to others
professions is that they give the best effort to develope
and protect their country. Correct your spelling
develop
For instance
, teachers teach children many important lessons, which are very helpuful
to grow their Correct your spelling
helpful
presonal
and professional life. Correct your spelling
personal
Furthermore
, people from these types of occupations never think about their own future, they always think how
they can do some special for society. Change preposition
about how
Hence
, it is needed to pay them
Correct your spelling
the
high
salary.
Another point to consider to pay Add an article
a high
high
amount of Correct article usage
a high
money
to them is that they deserve it for their sacrifice. Doctors and nurse
always stand by patients without any Fix the agreement mistake
nurses
expactation
from themCorrect your spelling
expectation
expectations
,
and try everything Remove the comma
apply
as
they can do to save Change preposition
apply
them
life. Correct pronoun usage
their
For example
, In COVID-19 doctors and nurse
have been staying for 20 to 30 days continues in the Fix the agreement mistake
nurses
hopsital
without their family, even they could not meet Correct your spelling
hospital
Correct pronoun usage
their
them
Correct your spelling
the
children
. Add the comma(s)
,children
Therfore
, they should have Correct your spelling
Therefore
Correct article usage
the rights
rights
to earn good Fix the agreement mistake
right
money
.
On the other hand
, Add an article
the person
a person
person
in the Fix the agreement mistake
people
field
sports
and entertainment should Change preposition
of sports
also
recieve
good Correct your spelling
receive
money
, as they apply themselves to achieve their goals in their particuler
Correct your spelling
particular
field
. A sportman
and entertainers have Correct your spelling
sportsman
sportsmen
Fix the infinitive
to work
work
hard, and they dedicate their life before Change the verb form
worked
participate
in their Wrong verb form
participating
field
. Apart from this
, they also
earn name and fame across the wolrd
, and it is proud Correct your spelling
world
for
their country. so, they Change preposition
of
also
deserve a good amount of money
.
In conclusion, Professional workers contributes
greater than Change the verb form
contribute
others
filed, so they should be paid higher than them. But, should be focused the
good salary for Change preposition
on the
others
filed.Submitted by patelpayal8296 on
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Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.