The international retail company you work for is concerned about the performance of its New York store. Your line manager has asked you to write a proposal making recommendations for the store’s future. Look at the information in the image, on which you have already made some notes. Then, using all your notes, write your proposal.

Dear New York
stock
manager, I am a manager of an international retail company. I write
this
letter to tell you that I am concerned about the performance of product sales in New York
stock
. Your
stock
is in a very good location but the performance is not good so we made the decision that if your
stock
does not improve the sales in 3 months, we would have to close it. To avoid the worst-case scenario, we have some suggestions for you.
First
, your company’s operating costs are too high.
Therefore
you can reduce the staff at times when is not the golden hour frame.
Secondly
, you need to decorate the
stock
more brilliantly and eye-catching.
Also
, make more sales events or give gifts, vouchers to attract more customers. I hope my opinions will help your
stock
to develop more in the future. Sincerely,
Submitted by Debbieng27.12 on

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    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
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  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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