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Writing Samples
Band 5

The increase in mobile phone use in recent years has transformed the way we live, communicate, and do business. Mobile phones can also be the cause of social or medical problems. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages of mobile phones?

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Most of the
people
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 on the earth have
cell
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phones
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 nowadays, and undoubtedly
this
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 invention has ,radically, altered the way we communicate with each other , and has interfered
into
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with
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 how we are running our businesses, and even into our way of thinking and emotions.
Nevertheless
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,
although
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 mobile
phones
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 bring about many advantages
it
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
 might impose a tremendous risk mainly on
the
Correct article usage
apply
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public health and on social
realatioships
Correct your spelling
relationships
. On one hand,
people
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 become closer to each other after the era of
cell
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phones
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 and while it was taking months of
painful
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pain
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 waiting to receive a paper letter from our beloved ones, it takes now just a
second
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 to communicate with friends and relatives. And some governmental transactions now can be performed completely on the
cell
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 phone by using a free mobile application .
Moreover
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, most
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smartphones
show examples
smart
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smartphones
show examples
phones
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 are provided with cameras that
enabaled
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enabled
enable
a
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apply
show examples
photographic documentation of
the
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apply
show examples
important daily events and social occasions.
Additionally
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, we can read now our
favourit
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favourite
 books on our
cell
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phones
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instead
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 of spending a large amount of money on buying a classic paper book.
On the other hand
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, there
are
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is
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 a
punch
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bunch
show examples
 of disadvantages of using mobile
cell
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phones
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.
First
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,
people
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ability
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able
show examples
 to perform simple mental calculations have regressed remarkably these days because all calculations can be done by
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
phone. A recent study ,
for instance
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,held in the USA revealed that since the introduction of smart
cell
Use synonyms
phones
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 , students abilities to perform simple math equations has declined by more than 30%.
Furthermore
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, it is not uncommon nowadays to see a group of friends sharing the same table in a coffee shop while each of them is
bussy
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busy
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 text
messeging
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messaging
 , surfing the internet , or even playing a game on their
smart
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smartphones
show examples
phones
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 that means ,
although
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smart
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smartphones
show examples
phones
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 bring
people
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 together or they supposed to do so, they might play the opposite role and keep
people
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 away from each other.
Finally
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, a considerable number of
people
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 became really
obssesd
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obsessed
in
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with
show examples
 videoing their life events even the private and confidential ones and whatever might
considered
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be considered
show examples
 silly or shallow. in order to
brodcast
Correct your spelling
broadcast
 it and gain some money out of it. All of those drawbacks , in my opinion, do not outweigh the uncountable edges of
such
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 a brilliant device. In conclusion , mobile
cell
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phones
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 have ,positively, changed our lives
Correct your spelling
forever
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for ever
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forever
show examples
, and despite the
cons
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,cons
show examples
it
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
 represent a
genuos
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genus
genius
 invention that profoundly boosted the prosperity of humanity.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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