Some people prefer young leaders, while others think that senior managers have the experience. What do you think?

The line chart illustrates the percentage of
people
who are older than 65 years in 3 different countries:
Japan
,
Sweden
and
USA
from 1940 to 2040. It is obvious that the population of the elders in 3 areas rises in that
such
period.
Moreover
, while the trend has grown gradually in
Sweden
and
USA
,
Japan
has seen a dramatic fluctuation. In 1940, only 5% of Japanese
people
who aged 65 or older compared to
Sweden
and
USA
, the
feagures
Correct your spelling
features
was around 8% and 7% respectively. In the
next
60 years, the proportion of elderly
people
in
population
Add an article
the population
a population
show examples
in those 2 countries has increased slightly.
By contrast
, there were reductions recognized in
Japan
, which kept the static maintained the same level around under
However
, in the future, there will be a big change
that is
predicted to happen in the country of East Asia. The proportion of old
people
will go up to 25%, which means it will have climbed approximately 20% within 10 years, from 2020 to 2030.
Futhermore
Correct your spelling
Furthermore
, whereas
Sweden
and
USA
will have around 23% and 25% respectively of
people
whose ages are 65 or more,
Japan
will
probally
Correct your spelling
probably
surpass them and hit a peak at 28% by 2040.
Submitted by khanhlinh190696 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: