Some people are of the opinion that children should be rewarded for good behaviour. Others think they should be punished for bad behavior. Discuss both views and give your personal opinion and reasons.

Many believe that
children
should get rewards according to their performance.
However
,others say that they need a punishment for their worse conduct. In
this
essay,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
will outline both views and discuss various reasons and give the necessary opinions. On the one hand,parents think that
children
need to get rewards for good conduct and avoid punishments.
For example
,giving pocket money and appreciation by giving some stickers gives motivation for the young ones.
Moreover
,
this
helps them in differentiating the positives from the negatives.
Secondly
,teachers and parents need to discuss with their teenagers, when they grew up discussing how to handle situations in different outcomes
such
as making friends with different cultures and social
role
Fix the agreement mistake
roles
show examples
.
Moreover
,
this
learning can gain confidence and
also
give knowledge in conflict resolutions.
Lastly
,giving rewards for each and every situation can reflect child behaviours
such
as
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
tantrums and moodiness,anger,frustration because if they are not awarded for the right practice.
Furthermore
, depression is
also
one of the unusual
attitude
Change to a plural noun
attitudes
show examples
that can be seen in most
children
. From other perspectives,
children
need to get punished for their bad performance, because sometimes it may get worse situations.
For instance
,child robbery and showing disrespect to elders.
Moreover
,if elders punish them and teach the appropriate performance
this
can help them in showing the right path.
Furthermore
,government and police authorities need to educate the prisoners as
this
can reduce crime events that are happening in society. In conclusion, I believe that people need to learn how to differentiate good things from bad from an early age
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
because
this
can change the society in educating them how to handle different situations in various circumstances.
Submitted by ar050682 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Positive reinforcement
  • Behavioral motivation
  • Praise
  • Extrinsic motivation
  • Internal discipline
  • Consequences
  • Time-outs
  • Removal of privileges
  • Logical consequences
  • Psychological effects
  • Child-parent relationship
  • Negative reinforcement
  • Consistency
  • Fairness
What to do next:
Look at other essays: