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Writing Samples
Band 5

successful sports professionals can earn a great deal more money than people in other important professions. Some people think this is fully justified while others think it is unfair. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#sports #professionals #money #people #professions
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As a fan of many types of
sports
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, I am
nevertheless
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 surprised knowing that successful sportsmen, Jordan,
for example
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, can earn much more money than other successful
professionals
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 in other sectors. I know that some
people
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 think it is fully justified
,
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apply
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 because to be successful in
sports
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, a person must be trained from the very early childhood and has to work very hard every day. They have to sacrifice many joys in their life in order to save time for practice, for becoming stronger and better skilled. And they have a very risky life – a lot of injuries may happen during the games and competitions that may lead to long-term health effects
such
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 as cracked bones or disability
in
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for
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 the rest of their life, or even to death. That’s
also
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 the reason why many
sports
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professionals
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 cannot sustain their job for long. As a matter of fact, they will see degradation in their performance after reaching the age of 40, and
then
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, it will be difficult for them to have good earnings.
On the other hand
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, some
people
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 think that it is unfair that successful
sports
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professionals
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 can earn more than, say, well-known scientists. These
people
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 think that a scientist uses his brain and works very hard days and nights. And his invention can lead to a very big change
to
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in
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 the whole world. Think about
vaccine
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the vaccine
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 against Covid 19.
Therefore
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, how can David Beckham earn a million dollars just from an advertisement on TV, while a Nobel prize winner for physics earns only several hundred thousand dollars a year? It’s totally unfair. My point is there should be a better scheme for wealth allocation
,
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apply
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 so that successful and talented
people
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 in other sectors can be paid better. Possibly a good taxation system can help to do it. So on the one hand,
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sports
Correct your spelling
sportspeople
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people
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 can still be highly paid for their efforts, but
on the other hand
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, other
professionals
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 in other sectors can
also
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 be recognized for their works and contribution to society.
Submitted by hhuong61917 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • financial remuneration
  • exceptional
  • merit
  • talent
  • demand
  • entertainment value
  • career span
  • physical demands
  • justified
  • unfair
  • criticism
  • income inequality
  • societal priorities
  • sportsmanship
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