The number of who are at risk of serious health problems due to being overweight is increasing. What is the reason of growth overweight in society.
As the number of overweight
people
has increased, so has the amount of serious Use synonyms
health
Use synonyms
problems
. No doubt that Use synonyms
problem
of Correct article usage
the problem
having
overweight has become more globalized, evidence for that can be shown by Verb problem
being
percentage
of obese Add an article
the percentage
people
all over the world. Use synonyms
According to
statistics approximately 30% of Linking Words
Correct article usage
the Earth
Earth
population Change noun form
Earth's
suffer
fromCorrect subject-verb agreement
suffers
having
excess Unnecessary verb
apply
weight
. earlier obesity in developed countries suffered mainly Use synonyms
women
, But nowadays the inhabitants of Change preposition
from women
such
countries begin to get fat from the young. Recent scientific research Linking Words
have
discovered that most Change the verb form
has
of
obese Change preposition
apply
people
have common Use synonyms
health
Use synonyms
problems
. Use synonyms
Also
, for Linking Words
people
who have extra Use synonyms
Use synonyms
weight
it was harder to recover from sickness than Add a comma
weight,
people
who lead healthy Use synonyms
lifestyle
and have normal Fix the agreement mistake
lifestyles
weight
. Excess Use synonyms
weight
may increase the risk for many Use synonyms
health
Use synonyms
problems
, including diabetes, high blood pressure, heart disease and strokes, certain types of cancer, sleep apnea, osteoarthritis and kidney disease. All of Use synonyms
this
bouquet of deceases show that being overweight entail hazardous risk for Linking Words
Use synonyms
health
of society. There are different reasons that cause obesity among inhabitants of our planet. Most of Add an article
the health
population
get overweight Add an article
the population
due to
fast foods which contain huge Linking Words
amount
of fat. When Fix the agreement mistake
amounts
people
start to eat more calories than Use synonyms
daily
need, in Correct pronoun usage
they daily
consequence
Add the comma(s)
consequence,
people
gain extra kilos. Use synonyms
Also
, it was found that overweight Linking Words
people
contribute Use synonyms
carbohydrate containing
food, and do less activity. Another reason is being stressed, regarding job, family Add a hyphen
carbohydrate-containing
problems
, Use synonyms
divorce
. Emotional and stressed Correct word choice
and divorce
people
have Use synonyms
propensity
for gaining Add an article
a propensity
weight
. In conclusion, L would like to say that Use synonyms
people
should pay more attention Use synonyms
about
their Change preposition
to
health
. Being obese and Use synonyms
suffer
from lack of Wrong verb form
suffering
weight
Use synonyms
are
equally detrimental Change the verb form
is
for
Change preposition
to
health
. So, it is useful to find balance in everything. Use synonyms
overwe
Correct your spelling
over we
peaple
Correct your spelling
people
Submitted by k.zhaukhar on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite