The uses of social media, such as Facebook, Twitter, are replacing face-to-face contact in this century. Do you think the advantages of this way outweigh the disadvantages?

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Technology is intervening in all sectors nowadays

due to

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its advancements.Earlier there used to be direct communication between

the

Correct article usage

apply

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people but now with the development of many social ,applications face-to-face contact is decreased .In my opinion ,

this

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is not a good practice.

This

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essay will

further

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elaborate on the negative effects of

this

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trend and see how the disadvantages outweigh the advantages. There are myriad reasons which will

further

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explain

this

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argument but the most preponderant one stems from the fact that the bond between persons may deteriorate in the course of time if they don't have a real conversation.Most individuals are addicted to posting their personal pictures,

videos

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and videos

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on Facebook,

Instagram

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and Instagram

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and are spending a considerable amount of time on them.

As a result

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,folks are detaching from their loved ones.

For instance

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,a couple spending the most time on social media applications like Twitter,

Snapchat

Correct word choice

and Snapchat

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tend to have a weak bond and their relationship may not

last

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long.

Hence

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, the majority of society is against

this

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trend. Probing ahead,another disadvantage is that virtual communication is not as effective as real communication.Everyone is

focussing

Correct your spelling

focusing

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on the advantages of social media and

are

Correct subject-verb agreement

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paying less attention to its side effects.

Although

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with the help of social

platforms

Add a comma

platforms,

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many crimes are solved,there are many lawless activities done through them.

For example

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,there are many complaints of profile hacking by hackers,who misuse the data of others.

Therefore

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,the public is afraid of using

such

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platforms these days and is creating a fearful atmosphere.

To conclude

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,there are some acceptable benefits of these mobile applications but the drawbacks are heavy when compared

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physical interaction is more effective,beneficial,fruitful and is likely to strengthen bonds.It is acceptable to have a connectionless talk in some tough times but everyone must find a date to have a real meeting rather than through mobiles.

rameshchanndra801Tue Nov 09 2021

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Task Response

Task Response: The essay addresses the prompt but could further develop the discussion on whether the advantages of social media outweigh the disadvantages. Include a balanced analysis of both sides.

Coherence and Cohesion

Coherence and Cohesion: The essay has a basic structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. To improve coherence and cohesion, work on linking ideas more effectively within and between paragraphs. Use transition words and phrases to guide the reader through your arguments smoothly.

12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

292 words

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