many believe that it is important to protect all wild animals, while others think that it is important to protect some, not all of them. discuss both views and give your opinion.

Wildlife sanctuaries are constructed for the sole purpose of protecting wild animals
while
imprinting the natural habitat. Several perceive that it is vital to defend every untamed creature,
although
, some consider
to guard
Change the verb form
guarding
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specific species rather than each and every
one
. In my opinion, the former notion is reasonable as no human being should interfere in matters regarding biodiversity
as well as
provide equal rights. To commence with, on
one
Correct article usage
the one
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hand, it is perceived beneficial to protect the entire fauna. To put it more simply, each of the undomesticated animals has developed particular characteristics which ought to provide benefits to the economy
as well as
the ecosystem.
For instance
, the entire food chain is interlinked through
one
another, if
one
being is eliminated,
thus
Rephrase
apply
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unbalancing of the sequence is bound to happen.
On the other hand
, others believe that certain genes should be reserved.
In other words
,
this
can be
due to
the reason that some of them are ferocious
consequently
, posing as a threat to the remaining.
Furthermore
, some
fraction
Fix the agreement mistake
fractions
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of those may not be as
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
advantage
Replace the word
advantageous
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compared to other wild creatures.
For instance
, various invertebrates utilized for medicinal purposes which reside in rainforests bear a risk of being attacked by eagles, proportionally decreasing their population. In conclusion, the
overall
animal population should be preserved
instead
of selective breeding because intervening between ecosystems can be inflicting.
Therefore
, it is advisable not to acquire fauna in our hands.
Furthermore
, if the conditions are ideal the number of animals will increase significantly.
Submitted by singhlakhvir76186 on

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task response
The essay response partially addresses the task, but could have provided a more balanced discussion of both views, and a clearer opinion.
coherence cohesion
The introduction lacks clarity and the conclusion is abrupt. The essay would benefit from a more coherent structure, with clearer topic sentences and smoother transitions between ideas.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • natural habitats
  • ecological balance
  • biodiversity
  • confinement
  • natural stimuli
  • psychological problems
  • genetic homogeneity
  • environmental changes
  • adapt and evolve
  • survival of the fittest
  • social structures
  • communication patterns
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