IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Many people think that nowadays people are being subjected to more and more pressure in their work and while traveling to their work causing them to have very less time for themselves. What is your opinion?

Undoubtedly,
working
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the working
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 class in the society feels more pressurized for their work and has to spend more
time
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 in travel for their work than earlier. Some experts are of
believe
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believing
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 that
this
Linking Words
 has resulted in
storage
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the storage
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 of
time
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 for themselves. My inclination is in line with
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the above
an above
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above mentioned
Add a hyphen
above-mentioned
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 notion as competition has increased among peers, and due to
traffic
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issues
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 or remote working location period of travelling to
office
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 has increased.
One
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 point is that, nowadays, everybody is in a rat race and wants
in
Change preposition
to
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 excel in his or her field to surpass others.
This
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 has created
sheer
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the sheer
a sheer
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 amount of pressure on employees to perform better than their peers. For an instance,
one
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 of my senior's
promotion
Fix the agreement mistake
promotions
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 is due for
Linking Words
last
Correct article usage
the last
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 two years, and he has been working 12
hours
Use synonyms
 to meet the
Correct your spelling
deadlines
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dead lines
Correct your spelling
deadlines
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 of the project in
such
Linking Words
 a manner that he has got no
time
Use synonyms
 for himself to relax.
Hence
Linking Words
, working pressure because of competition has been
one
Use synonyms
 of the main causes for the people not to have any free
time
Use synonyms
 for themselves. Another point to note is that
traffic
Use synonyms
 has become more
time
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-consuming than earlier. It has become
common
Correct article usage
a common
show examples
 scenario that
one
Use synonyms
 has to spend
hours
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 on road before reaching to
office
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.
Traffic
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issues
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 in Delhi during morning
office
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hours
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 perfectly exemplifies
this
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 problem because people
tends
Change the verb form
tend
show examples
 to spend
hours
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 in
traffic
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 jams before they could reach their destinations.
Therefore
Linking Words
, had there been no
traffic
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issues
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 people could have
spare
Wrong verb form
spared
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 more
time
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 for themselves rather than waiting in
car
Correct article usage
a car
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 or on
motorcycle
Add an article
a motorcycle
the motorcycle
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 for the
traffic
Use synonyms
 to get cleared. To conclude, it can be reiterated that more competition and work-pressure
has
Change the verb form
have
show examples
 been imbibed in every
office
Use synonyms
, and
also
Linking Words
 the
above mentioned
Add a hyphen
above-mentioned
show examples
traffic
Use synonyms
issues
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has
Change the verb form
have
show examples
 become the part of
one
Use synonyms
's life.
Therefore
Linking Words
, it can be asserted that due to
this
Linking Words
 many individuals have no
time
Use synonyms
 left for themselves.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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