IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

It is very clear now that English should be the primary language taught in all schools around the world. Learning a different foreign language before English is, in today's world, a waste of time. Do you agree or disagree with this statement?

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Many people argue that children should learn the
English
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language
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 as the
first
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 priority for their
second
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language
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 after their mother tongue in most countries. If there is not practised in the modern era, it may be more time consuming by learning other languages. In my view, I would argue the essay with the following statements.
First
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 and foremost, depending on the locations that people are living for, may affect the children's education needs and
requirement
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requirements
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. In most of the regions, China investments and companies have occupied more percentages than the western ones. By doing so, parents definitely need to select Chinese as their primary foreign
language
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 in school.
Then
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, the babies can get more confidence and fit with the needs in the specific locations.
On the other hand
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, those who are communicating the other traditional usage based on their grandparents' guidelines may not need to study any other languages as a foreign
language
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. In spite of teaching foreign usages like
English
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, it may not be useful for their daily life and even in their work if they decide to re-enter back to their family businesses. In
such
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 kind of case, learning
English
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 is going to be an extra effort for them.
In contrast
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, every school should include the
first
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language
Use synonyms
,
English
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 in the curriculum except their national
language
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 classes since primary classes. If so, the children are used to with
English
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 same as their mother tongue and they do not need to study based on the job requirement,
meanwhile
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,meanwhile
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 their ages tend to be in working life.
For instance
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, the freshly graduated candidate cannot get easily the job in spite of lacking
English
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 skills in the interview. To be concluded, every factor has both sides of strength and
weakness
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weaknesses
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 facts.
Nevertheless
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, I strongly disagree with the above-given statement based on the facts that depend on the locations and job requirements.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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