IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7.5

Some people are happy to stay in the same area for their whole life, while others prefer living in many different places. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #area #life #places
Nowadays ,it is argued that some
people
 are joyful to live in the same place for their entire life whereas , other opponents want to live in many different places if they have a chance . In
this
 essay , I will explain more detail on both views in the following paragraphs and
then
 I will present my own opinion. On the one hand , some
people
 want to stay in their native place as long as they can . They do not need to learn new things in a new environment and,
also
 do not require to leave their childhood friends and relatives .
In addition
 , some families are building their businesses generation by generation.So , it would be difficult for them to start their lives in strange locations again .
For example
 , some Japanese and Chinese families believe that inheriting the family business is their duty and responsibility.
As a result
 , they can maintain their own culture and customs as long as they can .
On the other hand
 , other
people
 believe that staying in many different locations can get many benefits like a multi-cultural environment and some good opportunities . Obviously ,
people
 have to capture and practise new things like languages and food if they are moving to a new location . Undoubtedly , they may have more new challenges and problems in their new place like following the local's traditions To conclude , whether
people
 are living in their origin or different locations , they should contribute their experiences and knowledge to the particular society where they are living . In my opinion , it does not matter where we are living but we need to be
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
useful
person
Fix the agreement mistake
people
show examples
 for our communities .
Submitted by yetunthu.89 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: