Some people think that people who choose a job early and keep doing it are more likely to have a satisfying career life than those who frequently change jobs. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Opinions are divided on whether humans who enter the career market soon and keep dedication to
this
job
are more likely to get a pleasing working life than those who
work
in different positions. I strongly agree with
this
idea because they definitely have a defined career path and get a high promotion. It is a well-known fact that joining businesses early can
makes
Change the verb form
make
show examples
people
accumulate experiences and gain
job
satisfactions
Correct your spelling
satisfaction
show examples
Add the comma(s)
, therefore,
show examples
therefore
leads to keep doing
this
work
. As the matter of fact, the more time they spend, the more potential customers they will get.
This
brings them a lot of benefits not only in making money but
also
in increasing
work
productivities. In Vietnam,
for example
, many young
people
have started their businesses immediately after graduating from university and quickly made a name for themselves.
Thus
, it is important for
people
to engage in the
job
market as soon as possible.
Secondly
,
people
who find employment early are more likely to have
a better occupation prospects
Correct the article-noun agreement
better occupation prospects
a better occupation prospect
show examples
.
In other words
, after a while
making
Change preposition
of making
show examples
contribution
Add an article
a contribution
show examples
to
work
, they will sharpen their skills and abilities, which means they can receive a better promotion or even play a leadership role. In
additions
Fix the agreement mistake
addition
show examples
, they may have a
Correct your spelling
chance
show examples
change
Correct your spelling
chance
show examples
to enter international markets that will
benefits
Change the verb form
benefit
show examples
them a lot.
For example
,
people
who stay in one field can learn from their mistakes, enhance productivity and move up the career ladder.
Therefore
, having
a
Change the article
an
show examples
early
job
is vital. In conclusion, I believe that
people
who choose a
job
early and keep doing it will advance quickly and be happier than those who frequently change jobs.
Hence
, the
give
Change the verb form
given
show examples
statement seems very rational.
Submitted by domaianh.uliser on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: