IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

More people put their personal information online (address, telephone number…) for everyday activities such as socializing on social networks or banking purposes. Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

#people #information #address #telephone #number… #activities #networks #purposes #development
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For the time being, public personal
information
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 on social media has never failed to provoke controversial debates among
people
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.
People
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 even put their personal address or telephone number for a wealth of functions. I would contend that though
this
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 tendency can bring various unprecedented cases to some certain
extents
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extent
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, it may do more good than harm. Without a shadow of a doubt, putting private data online plays an imperative role in making human life more convenient. In
the
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a
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fast paced
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fast-paced
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 society,
people
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 may immerse themselves
into
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in
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 heavy workloads, which restricts them from getting a chance to date or make friends with others. By setting a general profile within some simple tasks,
people
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 can take advantage of social media as a wide network for them to meet and have a chinwag with strangers.
Furthermore
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, they can save time while still building new relationships with others. Facebook can be cited as a solid instance for giving
people
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 the online platform to put personal perspectives and socialize with the community.
Hence
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, it is undeniable that private
information
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 on the Internet helps users to easily get access to friends in a proper and less time-consuming way.
Although
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 some redeeming features of publicizing
information
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 into the online network are widely acknowledged, it is unfair if the disadvantages are not mentioned. Personal
information
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spread
spreaded
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spread
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 gives a huge source for hackers to abuse that and carry out some wicked acts
such
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 as stealing money or kidnapping.
For example
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, Tinder, one of the most notorious dating applications, has been overused to set up some organizations trading women as commodities and delivering them to China illegally.
This
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 not only poses a threat
for
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to
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 users safety’s policies but
also
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 raises the alarming issues of putting
information
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 online that needs some
promptly
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prompt
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 resolutions from administrations. To sum up, despite some undesirable situations made by anonymous hackers, updating private
information
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 on social networks contributes to human’s interconnecting at anytime and anywhere.
Submitted by hominhtrang995 on

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