IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Gender equality has not been achieved in our society. Women still do not have the same rights and opportunities as men. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

#gender #equality #society #women #rights #opportunities #men
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Some people believe that despite the attempts done in order to establish equality through genders, it is not achievable. I strongly disagree with
this
Linking Words
 statement. In the modern world, it may seem
women
Use synonyms
 do not have a significant role, but the truth is that in the
last
Linking Words
 decades, a large portion of
women
Use synonyms
 has achieved high-level jobs more than men.
This
Linking Words
 helps them to meet most of their rights just like men, and it
also
Linking Words
 has omitted most of the discrimination that happened because of gender.
For instance
Linking Words
, now that
women
Use synonyms
 are in a lot of management positions, they can help others to be hired.
Moreover
Linking Words
, these days humanitarian organizations try to make equal situations for all people,
in particular
Linking Words
,
women
Use synonyms
. They commence a great number of programs are organized to raise awareness about the importance of the subject. To illustrate, they hold some organizations in Iran, in which they teach girls who are in their childhood about how they can become successful in future. In conclusion, while it may seem
women
Use synonyms
 obtain no achievement in gender equality, they reach lots of victory day by day.
Submitted by sallamir on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • wage gap
  • gender parity
  • glass ceiling
  • gender discrimination
  • equal opportunities
  • patriarchal society
  • empowerment
  • stereotypes
  • work-life balance
  • inclusive policies
What to do next:
Look at other essays: