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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The tables below give information about sales o f Fairtrade* - labelled coffee and bananas in 1999 and 2004 in five European countries. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The tables below give information about sales o f Fairtrade* - labelled coffee and bananas in 1999 and 2004 in five European countries. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#tables #information #sales #f #fairtrade* #coffee #bananas #five #european #countries #summarise #features #comparisons
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The two tables below compare the
money
Use synonyms
 people spent in
five
Use synonyms
 European nations on
coffee
Use synonyms
 and
bananas
Use synonyms
 over a period of 5 years, which are labelled with
Fairtrade
Use synonyms
, a category of food produced
from
Change preposition
by
show examples
 developing countries.
It is clear that
Linking Words
Switzerland
Use synonyms
cost
Use synonyms
 the highest amount of
money
Use synonyms
 on
bananas
Use synonyms
 among the
five
Use synonyms
 countries during the
five
Use synonyms
 years.
However
Linking Words
, the highest ranking country of
money
Use synonyms
 spent on
Fairtrade
Use synonyms
coffee
Use synonyms
 was changed from
Switzerland
Use synonyms
 to the
UK
Use synonyms
. In 1999,
Switzerland
Use synonyms
cost
Use synonyms
 3
million
Use synonyms
 euros for buying
Fairtrade
Use synonyms
coffee
Use synonyms
, followed by Denmark and the
UK
Use synonyms
 with 1.8 and 1.5
million
Use synonyms
 respectively.
However
Linking Words
,
Switzerland
Use synonyms
 only increased
3
Change preposition
by 3
show examples
million
Use synonyms
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
purchasing
coffee
Use synonyms
 during the
five
Use synonyms
 years, compared to the sales in Britain rose dramatically from 1.5
million
Use synonyms
 to 20
million
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. For Denmark, Belgium and Sweden, the
money
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 they
cost
Use synonyms
 on
coffee
Use synonyms
 was stable with a little rise of no more than 0.7
million
Use synonyms
. Moving to the sales of
bananas
Use synonyms
, it is obvious that
Switzerland
Use synonyms
 consumed the largest number of
Fairtrade
Use synonyms
-labelled
bananas
Use synonyms
that they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
cost
Use synonyms
 15
million
Use synonyms
 in 1999 and 47
million
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 in 2004, which is well over
than
Change preposition
apply
show examples
any other country.
Also
Linking Words
, both
UK
Use synonyms
 and Belgium saw an increase in expenditure on
bananas
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, from 1
million
Use synonyms
 to 5.5
million
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 in the
UK
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 and from 0.6
million
Use synonyms
 to 4
million
Use synonyms
 in Belgium.
On the contrary
Linking Words
, there was a decrease selling of
Fairtrade
Use synonyms
bananas
Use synonyms
 in Sweden and Denmark, which had fallen
approximately
Change preposition
by approximately
show examples
 1
million
Use synonyms
 euros.
Submitted by 1044191048 on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "however".
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 75%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words money, five, coffee, bananas, fairtrade, switzerland, cost, uk, million with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "compare" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
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