Some people think personal happiness is closely related to economic success, while others believe that it depends on other factors. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Some
people
Use synonyms
think Rich
people
Use synonyms
are happier than poor
people
Use synonyms
just because they have more
money
Use synonyms
, while others believe that
happiness
Use synonyms
is not only
money
Use synonyms
but
also
Linking Words
rely on other factors. I mostly agree with the fact that
happiness
Use synonyms
is related to wealth but I
also
Linking Words
do believe that
happiness
Use synonyms
also
Linking Words
depends on individual thoughts and personal expectations. The majority of
people
Use synonyms
tend
Correct pronoun usage
who tend
show examples
to work long hours in order to earn more
money
Use synonyms
shows the importance of economic success to many of us.
For example
Linking Words
, in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
most middle class and poor families, both parents work full time in my country to earn more
money
Use synonyms
because they believe they can live happily if they are wealthier. It replicates that
people
Use synonyms
who are not rich believe
money
Use synonyms
brings
happiness
Use synonyms
to them.
However
Linking Words
, rich
people
Use synonyms
don't seem to live
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
happy life even though they are already economically successful.
For example
Linking Words
, according to news articles, Princess Diana who was a famous royalty suffered from depression because she had a toxic relationship with her husband. It is a great example of the fact that
money
Use synonyms
can't buy you
happiness
Use synonyms
. In conclusion, some
people
Use synonyms
tend to believe that if you are wealthy you can be happy in most ways when some
people
Use synonyms
disagree with that fact saying it
also
Linking Words
depends on other factors. In my
opinion
Add a comma
,opinion
show examples
I think
happiness
Use synonyms
is relative to individual thoughts and expectations because there are some
people
Use synonyms
who are very poor but live happily with their families while some rich
people
Use synonyms
struggle to find
happiness
Use synonyms
and vice versa.
Submitted by manisha.hettiarachchige on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: