some people say the best way to motivate and encourage people to work hard is to pay them based on how much they produce and sell. do you agree or disagree? give some relevant examples due to your experience.

It is often argued that financial gains
instead
of personal
feeling
Fix the agreement mistake
feelings
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of satisfaction and productivity are considered the main factor for a working staff to do
his
Correct pronoun usage
their
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best for the company.
Although
I agree that monetary rewards play a very important role, I think personal satisfaction is
also
crucial for a worker to do his best for the company. On the one hand, salary and monetary related incentives are the main reasons why a person needs to work. With daily bills and necessities requiring money, people are often driven by bills and daily expenses to generate a
suffecient
Correct your spelling
sufficient
income. The amount
bills
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of bills
show examples
an individual needs to pay daily are often the
caused
Replace the word
cause
show examples
of why a person needs to show to work for
salary
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a salary
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.
On the other hand
, happy colleagues, positive and emotionally nurturing working
environementt
Correct your spelling
environment
environments
can contribute
also
to an individual effort for the company to prosper.
Firstly
, art and music draw people’s attention to diverse phenomena and represent the inward significance of things. Quite often a single drawing, piece or song can exhort myriads of people to reconsider their attitude towards some situation.
This
way, art serves as a major source of
nation’s
Correct article usage
the nation’s
show examples
personal and intellectual development.
Moreover
, visiting museums, watching movies and listening to music are common ways of relaxation and entertainment.
Thus
,
art
Correct article usage
the art
show examples
sector is
also
important for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society and should not be neglected. To conclude, though I agree that the government should allocate a large part of its budget
on
Change preposition
to
show examples
such
urgent needs of the society like public services, I think that arts, music and theatre should
also
be financed since they play an important role in people’s development and entertainment.
Submitted by cherrepol on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • intrinsic preference
  • liberating
  • physical activity
  • chronic diseases
  • natural light
  • job satisfaction
  • environmental connection
  • monotonous
  • dynamic
  • stimulating
  • fulfilling career
  • creativity
  • inspire
  • office politics
  • corporate structures
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