IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

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Recently, companies are more likely to emphasise the new modification of their
products
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 in their advertising. In my opinion, there are two main reasons for
this
Linking Words
 and I believe it is a beneficial development. Businesses are trying to show the changes
of
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in
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 their
products
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 for two primary reasons. On the one hand,
people
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 all have
innate
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an innate
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 curiosity for trying something new since they were born, and the new change in the
products
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 may seem appealing to them.
For example
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, most
of
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apply
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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domestic facilities now have a long lifetime, and
people
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 are unlikely to purchase a new one until they are broken. In order to persuade
people
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 to buy a new product, companies have to design something new to attract their attention.
On the other hand
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, it is
also
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 a way to make
people
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 consider the new
products
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 deserve the price. If the
products
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 do not change in any aspect, individuals may reckon that buying
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
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as
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is
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 a waste of money. In my view, I consider it to be a positive trend because
this
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 could be a motivator for innovation. The trend of pursuing something new is regarded as the source of some technological development.
For example
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, companies have to try and make some changes in their
products
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 in order to cater for their customers' preference, and after thousands of times of trying, they may achieve a new well-improved product which is much better than the current one, while if
people
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 do not have the desire for a new thing, it is unlikely for scientists or designers to make
further
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 progress. In conclusion, there are two reasons for the preference of businesses that they are likely to put their emphasis on the changes of their
products
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, and personally, I believe it is a positive development.

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • emphasise
  • advertising
  • products
  • innovation
  • competitive strategy
  • consumer dissatisfaction
  • value
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