Many doctors are concerned about the high use of computer games by children and young people . What physical and mental problems arise from excessive use of these games . How could this problems be reduced .

#doctors #computer #games #children #people

Nowadays

computer

games

are popular among youth and

children

. Advanced technology's make it easy to play

computer

games

Children

and the young generation are addicted to video

games

. At present ,

children

don't get enough space to play outdoor

games

like football, cricket, badminton etc especially our urban

children

for

this

reason they prefer to play

computer

games

in their home and other places. People are being attacked by different kinds of chronic illnesses

also

someone is losing their eyes power . Not only our

children

are being attacked by different kinds of diseases but

also

those who work in an office and they have to complete their work by using a

computer

also

they . Those who lead a sedentary lifestyle are to face various mental and physical problems .

For example

, my nephew who is addicted to

computer

games

already he have been attacked by some mental problems . In my opinion , we can take some steps to neutralise

this

problem . There needs some act like those who are under 18 they can't play these

games

. The advertising of these

games

on social media should be reduced . Parents should be careful about their

children

what kind of

games

they are playing on the

computer

are they are addicted or not . To sum up , those who are facing mental illness can consult with a psychologist . Acting some executive laws against

computer

games

we can decrease the excessive use of computers.

Submitted by paveldewan2000 on Fri Dec 03 2021

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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3Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

251 words

7.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

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Many doctors are concerned about the high use of computer games by children and young people . What physical and mental problems arise from excessive use of these games . How could this problems be reduced .

Fully explain your ideas

writing task 1 The plans below show how the ground floor of a particular building has changed over time. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

Today, more people are travelling than ever before. Why is this the case? What are the benefits of travelling for the traveller?

More and more wild animals are on the vergeof extinction and others are on the endangered list. What are the reasons for this? What can be done to solve this peoblem?

Some people think that a person improves intellectual skills better when doing group activities. To what extent do you agree? Use specific details and examples to explain your view.

In many countries, children are engaged paid in some kind of paid work. some people regard this as completely wrong. while others consider it as valuable work experience, important for learning and taking responsibility. discuss both these views and give your opinion.