Some people think that school and government should take responsibility to transport children to school. While some people think that parents should get children to school. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
How
children
go to school
safely is an important and everyday activity for both schools
and families. Nowadays, some people believe public
Correct article usage
the public
level
, Change the noun form
levels
such
as school
and Fix the agreement mistake
schools
government
should provide more Correct article usage
the government
service
for the younger generation. Fix the agreement mistake
services
On the other hand
, some people think parents
have an obligation to bring their children
to school
.
In regards to the responsibility of government
and Correct article usage
the government
schools
, the significant opinion of this
group is government
’s or school
’s transport is to ensure the safety of the pupils. Undoubtedly, a school
bus filled with all pupils and trusted teachers is much safer than other public transports
which are full of strangers with potential dangers. Fix the agreement mistake
transport
Moreover
, this
special transportation specially designed for travelling to school
will be efficient
and convenient than other Correct quantifier usage
more efficient
transports
, Fix the agreement mistake
transport
for example
, a line of
bus, which route is long to meet the demand of general citizens. Correct your spelling
or
Secondly
, the united
transport is able to set Capitalize word
United
parents
free for travelling their children
to schools
. Another role of many parents
are
employees, they are Correct subject-verb agreement
is
also
busy commuting to the workplace.
Nevertheless
, some people believe sending children
to school
by family is a more efficient and friendly way. Firstly
, since students reside in different places of
the city, especially in metropolises, the Change preposition
in
government
or school
must design several routes to fulfil the needs of the majority of children
. It will inevitably cost a lot. The cost may be better to invest in improving educational facilities and quality. Additionally
, a family can develop the best route for their children
, for instance
, if a student’s house is 10-minute
Correct your spelling
10 minutes
walking
from her/his Replace the word
walk
school
, it is more efficient to walk to the school
than take school
buses. The second concern is, as some experts said, the communicating
time for Replace the word
communication
parents
and children
is less in the recent decade, while
, the timing for taking the children
to school
is a good opportunity for a family chat.
In conclusion, I think both could be applied. Government
and schools
can develop some routes to meet the demand of major children
that travel to school
safely. Simultaneously, parents
are free to bring their children
to school
if they have a more convenient solution.Submitted by dancedance5 on
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Task Response
The essay addresses both views and provides a balanced opinion. However, some points could be more fully developed to strengthen the arguments.
Coherence & Cohesion
The essay has a clear logical structure with a well-organized introduction and conclusion. The main points are well supported with relevant examples. However, some transitions could be used to improve the flow of ideas.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?