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Band 4

A country becomes more interesting and develops more quickly when its population includes a mixture of nationalities. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#country #population #mixture #nationalities
It is often argued that as nations have more
hetrogeneous
Correct your spelling
heterogeneous
 population economies becomes more advanced and progress at a rapid pace. I completely agree with the given statement and there are two reasons why I think so and they will be explained in the
next
 few paragraphs.
To begin
 with,
different
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a different
show examples
set
Fix the agreement mistake
sets
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 of
people
 have multiple skill sets contributing to economic growth. It is a well-known fact that societies
having
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have
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experienced
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experience
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 and knowledge in different domains can largely give new dimensions in the field of technology and science especially in the booming industries in various countries.
For instance
,
Japaneese
Correct your spelling
Japanese
people
 have profound mathematical skills and are good at technical calculations.
Therefore
, various communities can foster economic development at a much faster rate.
Secondly
,
Correct article usage
the
show examples
presence of
different
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a different
show examples
group
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groups
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 of
people
 in a geographical area promotes peace and harmony. Undoubtedly, living together and working together
of
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with
show examples
people
 with
different
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the different
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 cultural
background
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backgrounds
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 can tackle terrorism in
a
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the
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 best possible manner when there are cross border conflicts. It is often observed that community participation strengthens unity and diversity. To illustrate, during world war II
sovient
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soviet
 union despite having
less
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fewer
show examples
 arms and
ammunitions
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ammunition
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 won the
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battlefield
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battle field
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battlefield
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 from Germany due to the fact that
people
Correct article usage
the people
show examples
 of
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soviet
sovient
Correct article usage
the sovient
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 union fully cooperated
each
Change preposition
with each
show examples
 other. In short, unity is
pillar
Add an article
a pillar
the pillar
show examples
 of strength. In conclusion, I strongly affirm that it is imperative for nations to have a
differnent
Correct your spelling
different
 mindset of
people
 in
its
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
 population resulting in a more friendly environment with
an
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apply
show examples
enormous growth.
Submitted by rahat on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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